Pirate Pride
by TurquoiseDragonfly
Summary: It's the end of Mac's Freshman Year at College, and she has a long summer to fill. Can she make new friends from old adversaries?
1. Chapter 1 - High School Changes Everyone

**Author's Note: **Not mine, not mine, definitely not mine! Thanks for letting me play with them though!

Spoilerific for Seasons 1-3 … this begins just as S3 is drawing to a close. Who knows where it will end. (Depends largely on when I get bored!)

Hopefully lots of MaDi & LoVe

This covers a similar time frame to epic how's Look Don't Touch …  s/6722034/1/Look-Don-t-Touch - If you've not read it do, as she is an amazing author, much better than me, so if you only have time to read one fic, choose hers! If you fancy another look at the same time period have a go at this. I would also like to apologise for anything I may borrow from other fics. Some fanfic is so well written it has become cannon in my head!

My first Veronica Mars fic… I'm going through a bit of an obsessive streak in anticipation of the movie, and this is my way of getting it out of my head!  
All mistakes are my own ... sorry!

Thanks for reading!

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"High School changes everyone." Parker screamed, her words shocked them, did they really not understand?

Dick had found her, drunk and distraught in the parking basement of the Neptune Grand. The caller ID said Parker, but Mac was surprised to hear _his_ voice.

"Ghostworld … your roommate's wasted."

"What?"

"You know, drunk."

"Could I speak to Parker please?"

"She's incoherent."

"Less coherent than you?"

Was his brain clicking into gear, or he was he rolling his eyes? Either way he paused. "Parker it's for you …"

Mac could hear the large sobs that were presumably coming from her roommate as Dick held the phone out for her. Talking was clearly out.

She could hear his deep sigh again. "What do you want me to do Ghostworld?"

"Where's Logan?"

"Dunno, out somewhere probably on a stake out with Ronnie, he's not answering his phone. Parker split with him yesterday."

"Where are you?"

"Parking basement, at the Grand. Look, do you want me to bring her to the dorm?"

"I can come get her."

"I'm sure you're much stronger than you look Ghostworld, but how are you planning on carrying her?"

Dick had a point. Yup, Dick Casablancas, had a point, and his point was that he could help her. "Ok, I'll meet you outside the dorm." She paused and remembered to add "Thank you".

Dick looked strange, normal maybe, driving Parker's old station wagon, a change from his usual 09er ride. Wallace and Piz appeared just as they were trying to get Parker out of the car. Between them, they could probably have managed without Dick, but he helped Wallace walk Parker up to their room.

"What did you do to her?" she heard Wallace ask as she was opening their room door.

"I'm a Pi Sig, we just attract drunk girls dude."

"She's your roommate's girlfriend, Dick."

"She was … she took him to Splitsville. I just found her like this. I'm helping. See, helping!" He laid Parker down onto her bed.

"Because of what Logan did to Piz? She split with him because of Piz?"

"Um, well, kind of." Dick turned to take in Piz's appearance. "Yeah, Logan's fists are pretty messed up too."

"I'm sorry, my eye really did a number on them."

"Sorry dude, I had to show him the video. It's Veronica, and, you know, Logan."

"It's always bloody Veronica and Logan." slurred Parker as she tried to sit up.

Mac, Wallace and Dick stared at her.

"Well, what's so special about Veronica?"

They turned to look at Piz, Veronica's boyfriend, graphically evidenced by the sex tape that was doing the rounds of Hearst, but behind the bruises his face was as questioning as Parker's.

Dick was the first to break the silence. "High school was complicated. You know. It changed us." he shot Mac, a quick look of … embarrassment? … apology? "Go Pirates!"

"High School changes everyone!" Screamed Parker bursting into sobs again.

"You know the story though!" stated a stunned Dick "Neptune High … we're Infamous!"

Piz' answer skipped a few of the finer details. "Logan's dad murdered Veronica's friend … Lily, Lily …?"

"Kane." Supplied Mac "It wasn't as simple as that though. Lily was Logan's girlfriend, and Lily's brother Duncan was Veronica's boyfriend. Nobody knew what really happened for a year…"

Mac wasn't one of the 09er crowd or even Veronica's friend at the time. But she was part of the fabric of Neptune High, and when the murder stretched Lily's closest friends Veronica, Duncan and Logan to breaking point, the whole fabric of the school warped along with them. The strain orienting all their lives to the loss of Lily Kane.

"… and then there were the bombings." Her voice broke. _And Cassidy?_ Cassidy's rip into the fabric of their lives brought her to breaking point. A strain she would forever share with Cassidy's older brother Dick. They didn't understand one another before Cassidy, how could they understand one another now the strain of his crimes warped their lives? Yet he was still in her life, anchored by their shared friendships. _Pirate Pride_.

"It really messed things up for Veronica … and Logan." Wallace wasn't exactly friends with Logan, but they understood one another. "They ostracised her. When we met Junior year she had no friends, didn't want any. Of course she couldn't resist the Wallace charm for long."

Dick managed to sound contrite. "Ronnie blamed Lily's parents, her ex-boyfriend Duncan's parents. We made things bad for Veronica."

"Speak for yourself" swiped Wallace.

"You weren't there."

"Ok, so, I wasn't there, but I like to think I'd have stood _with_ my friend."

Dick sighed, "We were standing with our friend, we stood by Duncan. His sister was, you know, murdered, and Veronica was blaming his parents. And Logan, well, he blamed Veronica for all that extra pain. We cut her out. We were awful … we … well … I am too sober for this." Dick slumped down against the wall by Parker's bed, his head tipped back.

They didn't talk about this. Ok, Mac talked about this, she had to, it was part of her therapy. But 'They' as a … group? They weren't a group, they weren't friends, were they? She barely spoke about this with Veronica, and yet here was Dick Casablancas sprawled on her floor, trying to explain something about their history to her friends.

He was right. High School had been complicated. It had affected them all, even thick skinned, Neanderthal 09er Dick had been devastated by the events of their shared High School experience. Ok, so becoming more of an irresponsible obnoxious man-whore wasn't a stretch for Dick, but she'd spent enough time in therapy this past year, to realise he was in pain. Her chest constricted as for the first them she understood that his pain was probably greater than hers.

She broke out the emergency beer from the mini fridge for the boys, a bottle of water for Parker, and went to sit cross legged against the wall, just close enough to Dick to clink bottles in some twisted tribute to their difficult shared history. "Go Pirates!"

None of them were really what you'd call 'talkers' so this was a new and scary experience.

Parker had managed to sit up in bed and was surveying the small group lounged around her dorm. "What happened to Veronica? She was raped…"

"Yes" said Mac.

Piz' gaze shot to Parker.

Was this news to Piz? Mac figured he'd known, even if he didn't know the full story. Parker knew: Veronica had told her about it after her own rape, and it would be unfair to Parker to deny it now for Piz' sake. "Yes. In High School. It was complicated. She was drugged."

Mac looked at Dick for help. Ok that was a mistake. She could see the tears forming in the corners of his eyes.

"We thought she was drunk. She shouldn't have been at an 09er party, nobody was looking out for her. Logan and I were fooling around with GHB and she accidentally drank a spiked drink."

"How did you accidentally spike her drink?" demanded Parker.

"I don't know. It was a long time ago. We were kids. We were drunk. We weren't the upstanding responsible college students we've become. Ok?"

Mac spluttered her drink, but she smiled, refrained from making a quip.

"It wasn't deliberate."

"I know." She reassured him. "Veronica knows."

"It was still my fault though. Beaver …" he looked at Mac holding her gaze "… Cassidy, wouldn't have done it if I hadn't bullied him."

"The loony kid who blew up the bus?" asked a confused Piz.

"My brother."

"My boyfriend."

Mac and Dick's eyes were still locked together, examining one another's reactions. So much of their High school story was entwined, but this was the first time they'd shared a moment. Taken the time to consider the other's perspective.

She heard Piz punching Wallace and turned to see Piz's wordless admonishments, and Wallace rubbing his bruised arm, "Sorry bro, it's not my place to gossip, I thought you knew?"

"You could have said something!" whispered Piz.

Dick chuckled ironically. It was hard to stop him looking for humour. "Well, at least we aren't as infamous as we thought, right Macadoodle?"

"Yeah, cos it's much easier telling your friends your first boyfriend was a murderer, than everyone just knowing."

Dick shifted uncomfortably.

"So…" Piz was angry "Is that why Logan beat me up? Is that why he thinks he has to protect Veronica, because _he_ dosed her with GHB?"

Mac was surprised to hear Wallace answer. "Kind of. It's a lot more complicated than that though. Parker said High School changes everyone, and she's right, but Veronica and Logan's worlds fell apart, they're still sorting out the pieces. Logan thinks he's responsible for how Veronica changed, and he needs to protect Veronica, often from herself."

"You've been taking too many Psyche classes mate."

"Maybe, but it's true. Logan needs to save people. He lost Lily, his mom jumped off the Coronado Bridge, he found out his father killed Lily, and on the same day he was framed for murder himself."

Dick grinned remembering. "He first started dating Ronnie after his mom died. She was helping track her down, he didn't want to believe she…" he paused "… jumped." When Dick recovered his usual swagger he continued. "His Dad threw this messed up birthday party for him. It wasn't even his birthday! So there we all are in the dark, waiting to yell surprise. Well, ok, I was mostly trying to cop a feel, but I digress. Yeah, so in walks Logan, he was trying to cop a feel too, they were ripping off each other's clothes when Mr Echolls switches on the lights and we all yell surprise. He was surprised alright! But so were we. Can't say I was expecting Nancy Drew to be getting jiggy with Logan! Logan was pretty pissed. Yeah, that didn't go so well. It wasn't long after that the whole Aaron Echolls thing blew up, and Logan was framed for murder."

Wallace continued. "When Veronica's best friend was murdered, her dad lost his job, her mom left, and Logan ostracised her. She went from sweet naive high school kid to super bad-ass crime fighting PI. Logan can't deal with all the trouble she attracts. If it weren't for Parker she would have been another of Mercer's victims. Aaron Echolls nearly killed her when she found his sex tapes. And Cassidy…"

Dick interrupted his voice monotone, trying to numb himself from his emotions. "Cassidy … raped her. Blew up the bus killing our friends; Ronnie was supposed to be on that bus. When she confronted him he tried to get her to commit suicide – he made her think he'd killed her dad. Logan saved Veronica, but he couldn't save Beave. He jumped. It was … a mess … he was a mess … we really screwed him up: Me, my dad, Woody Goodman."

The room was silent. Slowly the background noise of the Hearst dorms filtered its way in, until someone running along the hallway broke the spell.

Dick necked the rest of his beer, wiped his arm across his face, and jumped to his feet. "Thanks Macadoodle, lets do this again sometime!"

It took a few seconds for Mac's brain to recover after Dick left the room. She could feel the tears pricking at her eyes. Wallace Parker and Piz were discussing Veronica and Logan again, but she couldn't decipher what they were saying. She was still focused on Dick's words, and what she needed to say to him as she rose to her feet, and headed out of the dorm to find him.

She sped up as she reached the ground floor - afraid she'd miss him. As she ran into the parking lot a horn blasted, she looked around, but no, she couldn't see him. Just some irate jocks in an SUV annoyed she was blocking their exit.

Someone grabbed her hand and pulled her out of its way. "For future reference Mac-Attack, jumping off the Grand is a much more effective way of killing yourself."

She pulled her hand out of his. "I was … I …" what was it she'd wanted to say? She spotted Parker's station wagon and remembered Dick didn't have a car here. Taking a deep breath and hoping her eyes weren't as red as his she spoke more confidently. "I remembered you needed a lift home. Come on, get in, she said opening her green Bug."

"So" asked Dick as she turned onto the highway "Isn't there like some rule about not getting into a car with a suicidal emo chick?"

"The way I heard it, I wasn't supposed to pick up random surfer dudes."

"I'm not random Macaroon."

"No?" She grinned. No, he really wasn't random, not in Mac's life.

He leaned forward to switch on the radio. She was surprised not to hear any complaints about the station, her favourite local indie. Especially after he'd gotten into the car without complaint, was letting her drive without complaint. Maybe he was too emotionally spent to complain.

"Thanks for bringing Parker home."

"I'm trying."

"What?" Mac was confused.

"Not to be a total jackass. Big Dick's back. He's being incarcerated. I don't want to end up like that."

"A white collar jackass, sorry, criminal?"

"No, being despised by my sons … Or the other thing."

"You don't have to be." Mac remembered her real reason for following Dick out of the dorm. "You can't compare yourself to your Dad or Woody Goodman. You were a kid. Brothers are supposed to mess with one another, parents are supposed to stop it before it gets out of hand. Your parents abandoned you and Cassidy a long time before Cassidy... well…"

Dick sat in silence for a few minutes. She tried not to pay attention as he surreptitiously wiped his eyes again.

When he'd calmed down a little he changed the subject. "They don't get it do they? Parker and Piz."

She shook her head. "No, they didn't live through it. They aren't Pirates. That's how life works. We grow up, move on, and eventually nobody around us remembers our past, where we came from."

"I don't want to forget."

"We won't."

"So we go through life with a huge part of us that nobody understands?"

"I guess we'll learn to explain it better. To the people who matter at least."

_'We', when did we become 'we'?_ she wondered.

The Pirate Population of Hearst was small, but she wasn't ready to let go of them yet. Luckily they'd be around for another few years of college. Well, after they returned from their far flung summer adventures. And she was stuck in Neptune...


	2. Chapter 2 - A Logan Shaped Buffer

**Author's Note: **Still definitely not mine!

… thanks for the reviews and follows, and favourites! … they make me feel special … and want to continue writing! x

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"I just need your best John Hancock, here and here, and it's all legal." Logan hesitated, holding the pen out of her reach. "Mac, you really should get a lawyer to look at it first. I'm not gonna go all Zuckerberg on your ass, but, you should know what you're signing."

"I read it big-shot! No hidden clauses, the print wasn't even all that small. Maybe you should explain the long words to me though, oh Great and Powerful Oz."

"Ok, Toto, you've gotta know a law student through the nerd-vine though. Please get someone else to read it over before you sign."

She rolled her eyes at him, lunged for the pen and scrawled her signature onto the papers. "Look, all legal…"

"Hey!" Dick was leaning in the doorway. "If you're gonna cheat on Ronnie while she's playing away with the Feds, best not leave a paper trail for her to follow. You gotta be, you know, a little stealth about it."

"Hey Dick." She hadn't seen him properly since the day he'd helped out with Parker. It was easier thinking about it that way, than the day they'd cried over Cassidy.

"Hey Macadoodle. So, what's he paying you? He's loaded n'all, but I doubt he can afford you." Dick was obviously in a more buoyant mood.

"You know it's _not_ a compliment when it makes me want to bathe in bleach, right?"

"Well, doesn't this just make _me_ feel peachy." Logan handed her the cheque and got up from the couch. "So, we're celebrating! Champagne? Vodka? I can raid a maids cart for bleach if you insist…"

"I'm ok thanks. Water will do."

"We can't toast with water."

"It's bad luck Macaroni." said Dick, slouching on the couch beside Mac. "Break out the champagne. Sooo, what's the business?"

"Grade My Ass. We're just sorting out the legal stuff, first quarter revenues, etc."

Dick was smirking. "Sorry, I didn't hear anything after you asked me to grade your… you know." He gestured.

"If you can find me on the website, you're welcome. Otherwise, anything below eye level is off limits."

Logan was back with glasses and a bottle straight from the refrigerator. "Unfair Mac! He has summer classes starting tomorrow, and _we're_ doing just fine without sending Dick on a fruitless search to boost our ad revenue."

"What makes you think it would be fruitless?" asked Mac with a wicked smile.

"Ok, evil temptress. Did you manage to look at the cheque, or have you been too busy tormenting Dick?"

She opened the envelope, slipped out the piece of paper and felt her face breaking into a grin. Logan's school project was really paying off. "Wowzers, and this is just the first quarter?"

"Well, you aren't quite in Zuckerberg's league, or even the guys he screwed, but it is a start. I'm just glad you're the tech genius and not my business manager. And to think I got a D for the project. Your unsullied naïveté _is_ adorable Gadget Girl."

She's still smiling as she puts the cheque back into its envelope, and safely into her purse. "Purity is a virtue Logan, especially when it blinds my adversaries." Her first business had been lucrative, but Logan & Dick didn't need to know she was behind the Purity Test Website that had rocked Neptune High for one fun filled week, and paid for her VW Bug with change to spare.

"So, shall we toast?" asked Logan handing round the glasses.

Dick took the champagne bottle and handed it to her. "Come on Mac-Attack. This is your celebration. Break out the Bubbles."

Their toasts got silly, but when Dick started with "Awesome Asses" there was really only one direction they could take. Her suggestion of "Delightful Dicks" was probably a mistake, but who doesn't indulge in a bit of drunken flirty silly banter with friends when they come into money and are loaded up on champagne. Was Dick a friend now? Things were definitely easier than before, but… '_live for the moment_' she reminded herself. '_Tomorrow will look after itself._'

Another bottle later, and they even found themselves some inspiration. So, while Dick ordered food they decided to register some new domain names before they were snapped up.

"Vegan please Dick." She shouted across the room. She definitely needed something to eat if she was going to sober up enough to drive home, and she didn't think Dick was normally a vegetable kind of guy.

"What's that, like mega vegetarian?"

"More or less."

"Hi, could you put me through to the chef please? Thank you … Hi, Thomas? Hi, how's the wife? … kids enjoying the summer? … yes, special request dude … could you whip up a vegan feast for my friend? We're celebrating. Thanks! … oh, me? … yeah, Logan's here too, we'll have burgers." Dick received a thumbs up from Logan "… all the trimmings, potato wedges and a stack of nachos as well please … Thanks! … oh, and could you send up a fruit basket? Fab!"

Mac looked up for the computer and smiled, she'd been here a few times, and she'd never seen fruit, not even when Veronica was practically in residence.

Logan's phone rang. "Aaaah, the little missus" he answered "Calling to check up on my summer dalliances, Snookums? … no, just the one … independently wealthy, yeah, she is inebriated … I happen to know her ass is A Grade … yeah, it's just possible she's corrupting us, Dick ordered a basket of fruit! … that's some FBI mojo you've got working for you all the way in Virginia … or do I need to sweep the suite for bugs?" Logan held his hand over the phone "Veronica says Hi, and apparently you aren't allowed to drive home as she doesn't think you can hold your booze." He spoke back into the phone and wandered off to his room, "Obviously we're going to have to improve her stamina this summer if she's gonna make it as a sloshed sophomore! … yes, of course we'll look after her … yes, I miss you too Cottoncandy… "

Logan closed the door behind him, and Mac continued her typing, it was only slightly 'improved' by the alcohol she'd consumed.

Logan and Veronica were 'On Again'. Well, Piz was out of the picture at any rate. He really didn't get it - Veronica and Logan. And happy enough just doesn't cut it, when you're used to the rollercoaster of adrenaline that comes with the love of a bad boy.

Officially they were just friends, waiting for sophomore year when Veronica would return to Neptune. Unofficially, Logan appeared to be playing it safe and staying well away from the ladies. Mac had spoken to Veronica regularly in the week since she'd left for her FBI internship, Veronica's PI mojo was really no mystery, she knew Mac was visiting on business this evening, even if she hadn't been able to pick up on Logan's hints.

"Entertain me MackyC."

"I'm working Dick."

"You're drunk and it's late, you can't be doing anything too important. Soooo, while you've got the computer open, you could, you know, show me?"

"And miss out on all that ad revenue?" she asked innocently.

"No fair."

She looked up at him, and asked as blandly as she could. "Do you really think it's there?"

"I've not decided yet. Before, I'd have said definitely not, but… but, I'm realising I barely know you Cindy."

"How?" she was surprised.

"It's on the contract papers."

"Oh"

"It's different."

"It's not really me."

"No, it's not really… Macalicious."

Mac continued typing while Dick switched on the games console and returned to sit beside her. Playing Halo on mute isn't really the way it's meant to be played, but apparently this was Dick's way of being less of a jackass.

When Mac finished her work, she picked up the second controller. Schooling Dick was a lot less frustrating than watching him play. And even without a 'Logan shaped Buffer' they had managed to relax into one another's company by the time their room service arrived.

Logan investigated the trolley of food enjoying Dick's discomfort when his head was blown off one final time. "Dinner's ready children. Jump to it, wash your hands, and maybe there'll be dessert."

"Wow… I was expecting, like a salad." Instead she received a selection of delicious mini-dishes: Vegetable Paella, Dainty Spring Rolls, Bean Salad, her own vegan mini-nacho stack, and for dessert a stack of vegan pancakes with chocolate covered strawberries and maple syrup. The boys had opened a bottle of white wine and topped up her glass whenever she forgot to say no.

"Dig in Mackers … the kitchen must be bored with club sandwiches, steak and burgers."

"We had Pizza last night!"

"Yeah, but that was take out … Sooo, is Ronnie missing me Bro?"

"So much so, she couldn't bring herself to talk about you Dick. She did give me the numbers of a couple of gentleman's clubs, where she hopes I may find an accommodating lady or two to entertain me in the long summer nights ahead … I said I'd probably pass the numbers on to you though. Apparently that was ok with her. How's Wallace doing in Uganda Mac?"

"It's only been a week, but he's been writing me long emails, whenever he's had the chance. It's really important for him to listen to their stories and help relate those stories to the rest of the world, so I think the emails are helping him think it all through. It's not easy visiting the displacement camp, and hearing about the lives of child soldiers though, and even harder to help them move forward I guess..."

She continued after a moment's thought. "How do you move on after stuff like that? The kids are programmed to kill, turned into killers by the adults around them, to enjoy killing, to encourage one another to kill. Then when they escape they have to go back to a normal life."

She could feel Dick holding his breath, staring at her, thinking of Cassidy again, and decided it was prudent to switch subjects. "So, what do you two have planned for the summer? Is South America… Surfing not back on, after…" She was thinking of Parker and Logan's split. "Well, Veronica's on the other side of the country, you don't have to stick around here?"

Logan shared a look with Dick before answering. "We decided against it. We're going for spontaneity and frivolity right here in Neptune. We have waves, and room service, and we just discovered that the chef can really cook! Dick's signed up for a couple of summer classes."

"And Logan's staying away from Trouble… and Kandy, and Crystal, and Misty, and … _all_ of the seven dwarves really."

"I can't stand the whistling. How about you?"

She grinned, "Yeah, the whistling can really grate. I especially hate it when bluebirds try to help me get dressed in the morning."

"And your summer? Staying in Neptune?"

"Yup, back with the 'rents. I agreed on condition they don't try to pack me into the RV for a camping trip. I've a short internship at Kane Industries coming up, and I'll be on campus quite a bit, I signed up to work with one of the computing PhDs, so I get to play with the supercomputer. Well, I get to get them coffee while they get to play with the supercomputer."

"Do they have Halo?" … _Trust Dick_.

"No, but I'm hoping for Global Thermonuclear War or maybe Tic-Tac-Toe. Joshua _is_ keen on his War Games, so I may get lucky."

"That the Post-Doc?"

"No, the computer. Am I gonna have to school you in classic movies?"

"What's your favourite?"

They all spoke at once.

"The Goonies" … "Point Break" … "Anything without my Dad"

Mac hadn't intended to stay with Logan for more than an hour or so. Their business didn't take long, but after a week back home with her parents, the verbal ping pong of college banter was a welcome relief. Yes, she had Max for entertainment, but her boyfriend, was … well … there was the sex! But communication had never been good, and was definitely lacking since he'd dropped his degree to concentrate full time on supplying slackers with stolen test papers. What had once been an amusingly ironic sideline to a Philosophy degree, was now a source of irritation. They had the summer to work on things though.

Logan and Dick were diverting company, and if they didn't have anything better to do on a Sunday evening than ply her with good food, alcohol and fast paced conversation then why not let them entertain her. It was late though, and the parental gatekeepers would be worried if she didn't make it home.

"So, movie marathon Macaracker?"

"Sorry, I believe it's pumpkin time! If you find a glass slipper you can keep it - they pinch my feet!"

"Uh, you can't drive Mac, V would kill me… and you… and then she'd find a way to kill me again."

"Sorry, Mackers, no keys till you've slept it off. You can take Logan's room, he can sleep on the couch. What?" Dick gestured to Logan. "I have class tomorrow."

"So chivalrous bro!"

"Thanks, not necessary though. I'm a big girl, I can find my own designated driver."

"Max?" queried Logan as she pulled her cell phone out and pressed the speed-dial.

She nodded, it was ringing. No… voicemail. Was Max ignoring her?

"No answer?"

"He's probably asleep." She tried to rationalise her annoyance. He probably wasn't expecting her to call this evening, but he didn't have to send her call to voicemail.

"You really can stay CindyMac." Dick reached out to rub her shoulder. "We can get you a room if you'd prefer."

She suddenly felt nauseas. She needed to get out of the hotel. It was barely a year since Cassidy had left her naked and terrified in his hotel room, and, and… She wasn't ready to go back!

Her brain was on automatic as she dialled the taxi company and left the hotel suite. She was vaguely aware of Logan following her into the elevator, riding down with her, waiting with her in the lobby, talking to her, and placing cash into her hand as he walked her out to the taxi. After she heard him giving the driver her address she snapped back into consciousness.

"I'm ok Logan, thank you. Honestly, I'm ok."

Her phone was ringing before the taxi had gone more than a couple of blocks. She looked down, expecting it to be Max, but of course it was Veronica.

"Sorry Veronica, I didn't mean to freak him out."

"It's ok, he understands. So, what's this about Dick ordering fruit? That'd throw me off balance too!"

Mac grinned "Yeah, that was it. He ordered fruit, and sweet-talked the chef into some delicious vegan dishes, and we played Xbox, while you and Logan got better acquainted."

"Hey, I was telling him about my filing system."

"Of course. I wouldn't dare to think anything else, least not now you have the power of the FBI behind you."

"When are you starting at Kane?"

"I get to play with the Hearst supercomputer tomorrow afternoon, the Kane internship doesn't start till next week."

"The Data Security Research Department."

"The irony isn't lost on me Bond. I'm gonna keep my head down, get the coffee, and hope nobody joins the dots. I accepted the internship before…" Mac stopped, she didn't need to spill dangerous secrets in a taxi. She smiled. At least she was thinking straight again.

"… you hacked into Jake Kane's revolting secret files?"

"It'd have looked suspicious if I'd pulled out!"

"So…" Veronica paused "It was the suggestion you get a hotel room?"

"Yes. Dick very kindly offered Logan's bed earlier, and that didn't faze me at all."

"Logan is indeed a great snuggler."

"Eeeew, the suggestion was that he took the couch… I think I'm so used to their suite now, it… it didn't bother me. Then I called Max for a lift home and he sent it to voicemail. I was just off guard and it shocked me."

"Feeling better now?"

"Much, thanks! Oh god, what time is it? I'm sorry V, it must be nearly morning there."

"Nearly, still I get to hang out by the coffee machine all day, I'll be fine!"

"You can go back to sleep now. Honestly!"

"I'm not doing this for you Q, I know you're fine. I have to report back to Logan that you're safely home, or else he's not going to be able to sleep, and I doubt he'd let Dick sleep either."

"Ok, ok, just pulling up outside." As she reached for her wallet, she realised she was holding a fifty dollar bill. Tucking it carefully into the back of her wallet she paid the driver, picked up her purse, and carefully looked around the back seat of the car.

Veronica listened as the car drove away.

"Ok … I'm walking up the driveway. The footsteps you can hear are mine. Nobody waiting in the bushes for me. I'm putting the key in the door. Turning it." Mac switched to whisper mode, hoping her parents were firmly asleep. "I forgot my computer in their suite. I'll have to swing by tomorrow when I collect the car."

"You sure you're ok Mac? I can stay on the phone till you fall asleep if you like."

"No, it's ok V. I just have to write a quick note to the parents, and hope they don't ask me why I didn't drive myself home. Thank Logan and Dick for me, they were great, I had a really lovely evening. Maybe the summer won't be so bad after all, I forgot what it's like to hang with friends!"

"Night Q."

"Night Bond."


	3. Chapter 3 - A Questioning Inflection

**Author's Note:** Hope you're still enjoying this, if you'd like to see more remember to review! … without encouragement, comment and criticism a poor fanfic writer may just shrivel up and cry.

Still not mine! … well other than the random characters you've never heard of before! x

* * *

Mac was running late. She had fallen asleep… eventually. She probably had the alcohol to thank! Unfortunately that particular gift had come with an annoying helping of morning-after headache, and her brain was still moving slower than toffee - even after: the shower; the granola bar; and the apple her mum left on the counter, propping up an embarrassingly parental good luck note.

She tried calling Max again when she got to the Neptune Grand. She was supposed to be meeting him on campus for an early good luck lunch before she headed to the computer lab, but hopefully he'd agree to dinner instead. It went straight to voicemail this time.

"Sorry babe. Hope I didn't wake you last night! I'm running late. Won't be able to make lunch I'm afraid. I should be out in time for dinner this evening. Call me!"

The elevator doors closed, and the young couple who'd got in with her managed to disentangle themselves and gestured to the controls, asking which floor she'd like.

"Penthouse please." She was embarrassed. She wasn't a _penthouse_ kind of girl, she'd proved that last night when she left in an almost catatonic state without her computer. The young couple were eying her up and down like they _also_ knew she wasn't a penthouse girl.

She busied herself with her phone and was surprised to see she had five missed calls, all from Max - from the previous night apparently. There was a voicemail as well. She played it after the couple exited. "Where are you?" She'd see him later and explain.

Mac shuffled her feet nervously, took a deep breath, and walked towards the suite. She'd made an absolute fool of herself last night, and would be very happy to wait a week or three before seeing either Logan or Dick but she needed her computer, and had a fifty dollar bill she wanted to…

Her thoughts were interrupted when Logan's door swung open spewing a tall, angry man into the hallway. He was shouting back into the apartment. "It was your mother who left, she never wanted you. At least I stayed with you and Cassidy… at least I came back!"

Mac backed away from the door, hoping she hadn't been seen, and froze against the wall. Dick's dad… Cassidy's dad… She _really_ didn't need to walk in on this. Could she make it back to the elevator without being seen?

"We'd have been better off without you…" Dick's voice was coming from inside. "Cassidy knew! It just took me longer to work it out is all… he _despised_ you."

"He was trying to protect me from your step-mom."

"He was _trying_ to _destroy_ you. He should have used another bomb, it would have left less of a …"

Dick had followed his dad from the suite, and stopped mid-sentence. Shocked to see anybody else in the hallway, he was staring past his dad at Mac.

Mr Casablancas turned and walked away. She wasn't even sure if he'd noticed her, he was standing at the end of the corridor, for all intents and purposes patiently waiting for the elevator.

The echoes of the argument bounced around her throbbing brain as she stood dumbly in the hallway in a staring contest with Dick. She supposed he was still angry, but when he spoke he sounded more shocked than anything. "How long have you…"

"I'm sorry" she mumbled "I just got here … I should have called ahead … I'll go." She turned, walked down the corridor in shock - for the second time in just twelve hours.

"Wait… Mac… your computer… Mac… You came for your computer?" he placed a hand on her shoulder, stopping her in her tracks. "Its ok, Logan left it for you, you can come in."

She let him lead her back into the hotel suite, his hand at the small of her back, guiding her to the sofa.

"So… last night musta been fun if you're back for seconds already."

Her mouth dropped open. Ok, she could ignore things if that's what he wanted…

"It's stupid. We've been trying to work it out … make it right. One of us always ends up starting an argument and storming out though. Mostly me."

He placed her computer in front of her and handed her a bottle of water. "I can't make it right. Cass can't forgive me now, and nobody else will."

"It wasn't your fault."

"You don't know what I did to him."

"I _know_."

They sat in silence for a while until he noticed she was rubbing her temples. "Did you take something for the hangover? Did you eat?"

"A granola bar."

"That's not hangover food Macadoodle. Is there vegan hangover food?"

She reached over and took an orange from the fruit basket beside her. Slowly pealing it, eating in silence.

"He didn't deserve a brother like me."

"Is it working? Blaming yourself?"

"Everyone else does. Must be worth a shot."

"You make it easy for them, playing the jackass." She paused. "It's selfish."

"What?" his voice was raised.

"I'm not saying you were a great brother."

He snorted.

"But you didn't make him a monster. It's selfish to think you had that much power over him. To make this all about you."

"I didn't protect him."

"Did you know he needed protecting?"

"Yes." Quickly he added "From Dad, and the bullying. Not Woody, I didn't know about the…"

Neither of them could say the word, but it hung there. _Molestation…_

"He didn't want anybody to know."

"No."

"You have to forgive _yourself_ Dick." She packed away her computer, fished around in her purse for the envelope with Logan's cash and placed it on the sideboard. "It's a cliché _because_ it's true."

"You're leaving?"

"I have to be at Hearst, and don't you have a class starting?"

"Yeah. I guess. I should go. Logan's sticking around for the summer. Trying to get me back on track. I need the credits."

"Come on, I'll walk you to your car."

"I'll let you carry my books if you like, CindyMac?"

Mac gave what she hoped was a withering stare.

Dick was doing a good impression of a well bread gentleman when they made it to the lobby. He signed for the parking, tipped the valet and waited with Mac for her car - his hand resting gently on her back.

A dispassionate onlooker would have seen a polite but tender farewell kiss between friends.

An antagonistic acquaintance may have seen Mac kissing her lover goodbye after cheating on her boyfriend.

Mac however was just shocked to be thanked, hugged and kissed on the cheek.

On the drive to Hearst she decided shock was an annoyingly unwelcome emotion, it always seemed to prevent her from saying her piece. And clarity of thought, five minutes after the fact was just tauntingly cruel.

* * *

Mac's afternoon in the bunker that housed the Hearst supercomputer dragged on into the evening. As supercomputers go it was slow, but to Hearst's research scientists it was invaluable, allowing them to crunch mindboggling amounts of data, and model systems that would otherwise be unfathomable.

As an undergraduate assistant Mac was merely a warm body to the team she was joining - just a gopher, useful for the coffee runs. But she was happy to be back in the presence of all that computing power.

'Brute forcing' the encryption on the stolen Kane hard drive was child's play in comparison to the kind of coding the research group had already compiled. Of course it _was_ a lot more fun when you were crossing the line into _minor_ felony with your best friend - but everybody needed a day job. Not that she was being paid, but the experience would be invaluable, and the college credits welcome.

Over the next few weeks the team, led by Simon, were hoping to iron out the bugs, scale up the runtime, and produce full datasets for the climate scientists with whom they were collaborating. She was familiar with Simon already, as a dull, but effortlessly competent teaching assistant, the two grad students were new to her though, Neil and Jacob. Jacob was the talker of the two, frequently answering on Neil's behalf, but Neil could hold his own when his friend was out of earshot, explaining his dual interest in computing and the ocean, which accounted for the tan, _rarely_ seen in the lesser spotted nerd.

The sun was setting when Mac finally left the computer lab, bathing Hearst in its stunning orange and golden glow - until half way across the quad where it was obscured by a looming shadow.

"Macchiato?"

"Hi Dick" She could see his face, now the sun was out of her eyes, and nobody else would call her Macchiato.

"No, not 'Macchiato!' … 'Macchiato?'" he said as if the difference were obvious. "With a questioning inflection?" he added seeing her quizzical look.

As he handed her an iced coffee his meaning became clear.

"Punny! You've been calling me random names all these years just to build up to _this_ moment of _hilarity_?"

"Just a happy coincidence Macchiato! It's almond milk, that's vegan, I checked. She said it would be better than soy. So… how was Halo?"

"Global Thermo Nuclear War? Great, well, the guys seem ok, and I got to look over some of their algorithms! How was class? Or were you distracted by the visiting summer students? Aka, _hordes_ of innocent young college girls who've yet to experience the _pleasure_ of your company?" she was grinning up at him.

"You know I gave up a surfing trip so I could catch up on school? Well, and see my Dad…" Dick's voice trailed off.

"Uh…" Her face fell. This new version of Dick was going to take some getting used to. "I'm sorry, and you bought me coffee."

"You can make it up to me, by letting me buy you dinner? Shield me from the hordes?"

"I'm sorry Dick, I can't, I have a date with Max" she looked at her watch, "Now! I'm not back on campus till Wednesday, we've got the early slot in the lab, so I'll be done by 2pm. Avoid the hordes till then and I'll buy you lunch!"

"I'll be here, trying not to corrupt innocent young things. Or get dragged into a game of Hacky Sack."

"Your probably safe on the second count. Visiting college girls are desperate for corruption though. Keep your hands to yourself and avoid eye contact at all costs! Got to go! See you Wednesday." she said as she spotted Max at the top of the steps.

"It's a date!" called Dick as she walked away.

* * *

After trading voicemails with him through the day, Mac and Max had arranged their dinner date. She was taking him up the coast to a vegetarian restaurant she'd been keen to visit for a while, and the cheque from her 'Ass Site' gave her just the excuse she needed.

"Did you miss me?" she asked after he broke their kiss. Only realising once the words left her mouth, that she had barely noticed his absence. Other than hoping he'd be able to give her a lift home, she hadn't thought about him at all the previous evening, and her day so far had been occupied by Dick and the supercomputer.

"Of course. Was that Dick Casablancas?" he asked looking back to where she'd been standing.

"Yeah" she said absently, barely breaking his flow.

"I thought they finally kicked him out? I made a fortune off him first semester. Dumb, rich, frat-boy jerks _are_ my bread and butter, and that one is dumber than most. He managed to lose half his 'study guides', so I got paid twice when he hit me up for replacements. Figured he must have been booted when I didn't see him begging for help with finals. He's friends with Logan right? You all went to school together? What was that like?"

"A long time ago… we used to be…" Was she going to say friends? Well that was clearly wrong. "Let's just say, we did _not_ get along. He's…"

She wanted to explain how Dick was changing, how they may finally be learning to understand one another. She wanted Max to shut up and stop judging someone he didn't know and couldn't comprehend. And realising that she'd been just as guilty of judging Dick before understanding him was troubling her conscience.

Max interrupted. "He's… a jerk? Yeah, I can't see the two of you bonding on homecoming committee. I didn't realise Logan was the same till he beat up your friend, Piz. Shall we go, what time are the reservations?"

Mac was preoccupied as she drove along the coast. She let Max fill the silence describing his new, off-campus housing, and endeavours to procure a fake Hearst ID so he could continue his test paper business now he was no longer a student. Apparently the black market at Hearst was alive and well and Max was looking to expand his interests.

Mac mulled. So her boyfriend was even more clueless than Piz and Parker when it came to understanding 'Pirate' History. And worse, her boyfriend had no respect for her friends. Yes, it was her fault. They'd substituted the traditional 'getting to know you' portion of the game for a more 'biblical' - she grinned - 'fun' version. And if Dick was a friend it was certainly a _very_ recent occurrence.

"You ok?" asked Max as they dropped her bug with the valet.

"Yeah, just tired. I didn't get much sleep last night."

"Where were you? I called, but no answer."

"I know - I didn't check my phone till this morning. We were playing video games, it was loud!"

"I'd have come over, met the parents, beat your little brother at Mario Kart. Family game night with the MacKenzie's sounds fun!"

"Yeah…" A lie of omission… "I did phone, but it was late - it went to voicemail."

"Sorry, my battery died babe. Hopefully you'll let me earn more boyfriend points this evening!"

The guilty feeling that spread through Mac's belly was unsettling, but she hadn't lied. She just needed a suitable moment to set the record straight. Let Max know that Logan and Dick were her friends. Luckily the business of ordering drinks, settling into their table and perusing the menu were diverting, and with Max' extra effort to make this a great date she managed to relax and enjoy herself.

"So, what's the special occasion?" He asked putting down his fork. "I was expecting lasagne from the cafeteria."

Mac smiled, her pea and mint risotto was delicious. "Aaaah... I came into money honey."

"The largess of a favourite aunt?"

She grinned "No."

"The inheritance of a hated cousin?"

"Nope."

"A gift from a wealthy admirer."

"No."

"Ok, I'm done, you'll have to tell me."

She reached in her purse and whipped out the cheque she hadn't had time to deposit. "Asses. Logan cut me a cheque."

"He bought you out?"

She grinned. "Nooo, first quarter profit! I went over and signed the contracts _yesterday_."

"So, dinner really is on you?"

"Yes sugarpie, I wouldn't drag you to a veggie place and make you pay."

Mac was feeling much better by the time they left the restaurant. Max knew she'd seen Logan, and even though she hadn't found the words to bring up Dick it didn't matter.

Enjoying a long passionate kiss at the Valet stand she was disappointed to realise it was late, and a summer with the parents meant returning home instead of curling up beside Max for the night. '_Perhaps Veronica would have some tips for juggling parents and boyfriends_' she thought while Max hands explored her back.

The valet's polite 'cough' startled them. Max took the key and the receipt while Mac recovered her composure.

"Ooops!" she said when they were in the car. "At least it wasn't my parents."

"It's going to be a long _hard_ summer," mused Max handing over her key and placing the receipt alongside the others in her glove compartment.

As she drove back down the PCH Max listened in relative silence as Mac recanted the edited highlights of her day: Mimicking Jacob's odd way of answering on Neil's behalf; describing Neil as part nerd, part surfer dude; and discussing the merits of working with Simon, despite his dull demeanour.

When she pulled up outside Max' new apartment and switched off the engine she was surprised not to be invited inside. It was late, and she would have had to refuse, but it would have been nice to be asked. '_Kissing in cars_' she was enjoying it when it reminded her of Cassidy, she must have tensed up as Max pulled away.

"I'll work out something with the parents Max. I can sneak out occasionally, and even if I can't persuade them to actually let me stay over there's not much they can do to stop me."

"I'll call" said Max leaving her in the car, and disappearing into his apartment block.

* * *

**Author's Note: **Look, there's a review box right there! … couldn't hurt to fill it out! … thanks! x


	4. Chapter 4 - Slow Ripening Fruit

**Author's Note:** Thanks heaps for all the reviews guys! It's really lovely and encouraging to hear that people enjoy something I've written, and definitely easier to continue to write when I know someone will appreciate all the work! So, keep the reviews coming! (Even a negative review is better than no review at all!)

Sorry for the delay posting this chapter, I needed to write a huge chunk all together so that I didn't end up writing myself into a hole. Anyway, as a result I've nearly finished the next two chapters as well as this, so hopefully they will be good to post soon.

Still not mine, all thanks to Rob Thomas! Been watching the trailer for the movie today – exciting! … oh, and Ryan dancing – yum!

* * *

**Chapter 4**

* * *

Mac was feeling uncomfortable, the subtle brush offs had been getting her nowhere. Had Jacob heard a word she said?

Things had started well - yes, six am was a little early, but Simon was keen to manage as long a data run as possible before he had to turn over the computer to the next research group. Unfortunately after just a few hours he had to leave for a teaching assignment, and when Neil became involved in a lengthy discussion with one of the technicians, Mac was left with only Jacob for company.

As he could hold down both sides of their conversation with very little input, she was working her way through their code - trying to understand how the team had mapped the dataflow to the system's architecture. "Do you have the earlier versions?" she interrupted him. "I'd like to compare, see how you came to this?"

Was that when things changed? It was subtle, he was indeed helpful, finding all the info she needed, but she didn't need assistance using a mouse, and as time went on she realised he'd brushed up against her more often than could be considered accidental.

"It's great having you on the team." He murmured "Simon and Neil are so focused, and it doesn't hurt that you're a looker, for a computer geek."

_Now there's a compliment!_ Mac tried to laugh it off - deflect attention from herself. "Hey, Neil's got that surfer tan going for him. And I'm sure lots of women are into pale and mysterious!"

She got up and walked towards Neil and the technician, trying to put some distance between herself and Jacob - but he followed.

"We should celebrate your joining us." Jacob added catching up. He raised his voice to be heard over the cooling system. "We can take her out for drinks this evening right Neil? That's a plan! We can go to the faculty bar. Or somewhere a little less stuffy if you'd prefer. Neil likes The Bay, I'm a fan of Bar & Grill…"

"She's nineteen Jake."

"She's a college student, all nineteen year old college students drink. If you need ID I know someone?" he questioned Mac.

"Uh, I'm ok thanks." said Mac. She rarely used her fake ID, but it was good knowing she had a Mars original fake when necessary.

"Ok… lunch then? We're finished in here soon, and you'll need to eat."

"No can do - I have a date."

"See, told you she had a boyfriend," stated Neil.

"'Fraid so!" Mac, didn't feel the need to point out that her lunch was with Dick - who was definitely not her boyfriend - or that her actual boyfriend had been doing his best to avoid her since she dragged him to a vegetarian restaurant. She'd called him in the end, the previous afternoon - asked if he wanted to meet up once she finished babysitting her brother. He was too busy. Studying wasn't a valid excuse anymore, and today he was _meeting contacts_.

"_He's_ one lucky guy! Doesn't stop _her_ coming for drinks with us…"

Simon's return put an end to the inappropriate solicitation for the remainder of the day's data-run. But as she left the building, Jacob caught up with her again grasping her arm "How's about tomorrow? I can buy you something to eat before we start. We're running datasets through the night, so you'll need food - may not be finished till dawn."

"Thank you but no" she said frostily, removing his hand.

They were interrupted by a welcome _menacing_ voice. "Is this guy bothering you Mac? I can have a _conversation_ with him if you like."

Mac felt herself relax. "Thanks Weevil, but Jacob was _just_ saying goodbye." If anybody was going to get rid of an overly friendly computer nerd with a single look it would be Eli Navarro - ex-gang leader, ex-con, bad-ass biker and, if you caught him on the right day, a genuinely nice guy.

After a hasty farewell Jacob wandered away, although not far enough for Mac's preference.

"You ok?"

"Yes thanks. He's ok, he just surprised me."

"Yeah well, he'd better think twice before laying hands on you again. Sure you're ok?

"Fine thanks, just got to buy Dick lunch, then heading home to torment my brother till I fall asleep. Our computer lab slot was _early_ so I don't have to see him again today."

"Dick Casablancas? You lost a bet?

"Maybe not…" she smirked as they saw Dick looking very cosy with a pretty blonde.

"Holler if you need me to get rid of him too! Gotta go – seein' a guy about a box!"

She laughed "Stay away from trouble Weevil. Who's going to clear your name while Veronica's in Virginia?"

* * *

It didn't take Dick long to extricate himself from the blonde's advances and make his way to Mac.

"Aaah, the pesky visiting student hordes, no lunch for you then!" she was grinning. Teasing Dick was an enjoyable pastime.

"Hey Macuccino! And no, that was totally your fault, keeping my hands to myself, made it real hard to push her off! She's not a student though so don't count."

Mac laughed "She looks familiar. One of your old hook ups back for a second helping?"

"No!" he looked back at the blonde "No!" He paused, thinking. "How do you know a stripper Macadoodle?"

"Oh!" realisation was dawning "Wendy!" _Max's ex girlfriend_. She'd seen photos, not many, Wendy hadn't stayed with him long enough for many, but she had left an impression on Max's life.

"I thought her name was Jenny?"

"I'm sure there's nobody better at remembering stripper names Dick, but whatever she told you she's really Wendy… Let's just say she's a friend of a friend." Mac paused to compose herself. "So, going Dutch on lunch then since it was so clearly _all_ my fault that _you_ were unable to fend her off?"

"Ah…"

Mac's face fell. With Jacob's unwelcome advances and Max doing his best to dodge her calls she'd been looking forward to getting out of the lab and seeing a friendly face. "You have to go?" She was genuinely disappointed.

"No MackyC, just, I got the chef to do a vegan picnic instead. Figured that way you'd have to have lunch with me, even if I accidentally… well, Wendy. _And_ we could enjoy the sunshine, sit in the quad, or there's the arbour behind the library, or the fountains by the Econ building, or the place the sorority girls sunbathe topless?" he was smiling - joking. She hoped!

"Do you have to stay on campus?"

"No, I'm a big boy Mackers."

"I mean, do you have to be back for class?"

"Nope, finished for the day."

"Then we can go somewhere quite? The supercomputer bunker is _loud_, and…" And she could still see Wendy in front of her, Jacob was hovering somewhere in her peripheral vision, and they were unnerving her. "I can't hear myself think."

"Anywhere you like CindyMac. Any preference?"

"No… somewhere cool, with water, the beach?"

"The beach is going to be heaving." He looked around considering the options. "How about a pool… you have a bathing suit?"

"Yes…"

"Here I mean?"

"Yes, in my car. The pool at the Grand isn't going to be any quieter than here Dick."

"No, I have another idea. Trust me!?"

She wasn't sure if it was a question or statement, and she wasn't sure she did trust him - but she acquiesced. "Okay…" she allowed him to swivel her round and steer her in the direction of the parking lot.

* * *

Mac was relieved when they headed out of town. Although she'd do a lot to get away from Jacob and the noise of a busy campus right now, neither an 09er pool nor the country club were her style, and she couldn't imagine what their High School classmates would make of them spending time together, even if it was just lunch. No, that was wrong, she could imagine what their classmates would say, and they weren't going to like it.

"Cell coverage is patchy up in the hills, do you want to call Max let him know where you'll be?"

"No, he's busy." Well, too busy to take _her_ calls at least. "I'll text my mom though - let her know I'll be home late cos I'm letting some _crazy_ guy drive me away from civilisation - you know, cell coverage, internet access, fluorescent lighting, a swift emergency response, _all_ the things a girl adores."

"Better text Logan too - he worries!"

Mac grinned. "Parents! We should'a told him earlier, he'd have enjoyed a road trip, get him out of the hotel, get him some fresh air."

"He'll live! I take him surfing like _every_ morning - had to leave him there so I could get to class. He's going to be bobbing around on a board waiting for Ronnie till summer's gone. 'Cept She's not going to recognise him with that wrinkle prune skin and the sun bleached hair."

Mac was enjoying the scenery as they continued up on into the hills, the wind whistling past as Dick's jeep rounded yet another corner, finally coming to a stop in front of a large security gate.

"Your secret crime fighting, gadget filled cave in the hills?" She asked as Dick keyed in the code.

"Sorry to disappoint Batgirl, but no."

The road beyond the gate wasn't much more than a dirt track, easily wide enough for Dick's truck, lined by rows and rows of trees.

"An orchard?" Dick didn't seem the type.

"Kind of. You asked for quiet, and this is as quiet as it gets."

A sharp left and Dick pulled up onto the grass beside a small white barn, with large shuttered windows.

"What is this place?" she asked as Dick retrieved the coolbox from the jeep, and slung a picnic blanket over his arm.

"It's my aunt's. Well, it was, she died when we were kids." Dick headed round the building. "Come on, I'm hungry Macaroni!"

Dick was right, it was the perfect place for a picnic - once you got past the fact that it was outdoors. On the other side of the building a nice shady veranda led to a rolling lawn. With mature trees to one side, and small rectangular glistening pool to the other, the garden looked out over the neat rows of fruit trees gently sloping away into the distance.

Mac made it to the centre of the lawn before she stopped, mesmerised by the view.

"Sunshine or shade CindyMac?"

"This'll do … we can cool off in the pool when it gets too hot, right?"

"Yes"

Mac was shocked when she found out the whole picnic was vegan.

"It was just easier, saves sorting it out" shrugged Dick as he dug in. "I can always get a steak when I get home - to counteract the veggie poisoning!" he smirked.

"Thanks! It does beat the cafeteria."

"Even without strip lighting?"

"Well, it could do with internet."

"It used to have internet, not sure any more though."

Mac was wondering why this didn't feel stranger - though not enough to prevent her from enjoying the sunshine, food and conversation. Dick was laid out on the other side of the coolbox, hogging the olives, talking about his courses, and the odd assortment of summer students. She was laying on her back telling him about her date with Max, how much she enjoyed the restaurant; and her day of pain chaperoning her younger brother to his various summer activities.

"He had go-karting, soccer and a pool party yesterday. Oh to be eleven and have a _whole_ summer free to play!"

"Sounds like Logan."

"I'm sure they gave us homework back then. Is there somewhere I can change? A pool without twenty-seven screaming eleven year olds _is_ the dream!"

"Sure, I should move this lot inside anyhow" he said gesturing to the generous remains of their picnic.

Once her eyes adjusted, she took in their surroundings. The building was just one large empty room with wood stairs to a mezzanine, a small kitchen area to one side with cupboards and a couple of doors at the back of the room. Dick opened the shutters allowing shafts of sunlight to stream through. Other than a couple of bar chairs in the kitchen area, the only furniture was a large white day bed in the middle of the room.

"She was a hippie - my Aunt Chloe, just born a couple of decades late. She had chickens, and a vegetable garden. It's not really more than a pool house, but she was happy. Her studio was back here," Dick added showing Mac through one of the doors.

The studio wasn't so sparse, with random objects in various states of repair dotted around the room. "She painted?" Mac was walking past an easel trailing her finger across the wall.

"Yeah it was a bit abstract."

"Did you visit often?" asked Mac noticing the uneven lines of a family height chart on the wall. Dick's highest line didn't come up to her chest.

"In between the faceless institutions the parents sent us here. Easier to convince us that it was normal to spend so much time away if they could say we were going to family. We loved it! We slept on the mezzanine and a couple of times Chloe let us sleep in hammocks on the veranda, at least till we got cold and came indoors."

"Who's Sally?" she asked, noticing the height lines at the bottom of the wall, something vague jogging her memory. "Your cousin?"

Dick knocked over an old coat stand as he turned. "She was my dog - a boxer. I named her after this mean girl at camp cos I thought boxers were mean too, she wasn't - the dog - she was sweet. We'd better get out of here before I break something. The bathroom's through there if you want to change. There's probably suntan lotion in the cabinet."

Mac wondered how she'd got so much grass in her hair as she brushed it out and braided it before getting changed, ditching her combats and t-shirt in favour of her bathing suit - a simple black two piece combo, shorts and a bikini top. She had suntan lotion, at the bottom of her bag, and massaged in a decent amount reminding herself that pale and mysterious is much easier to pull off than sunburnt.

She caught her reflection in the mirror and stopped. Ok, this _was_ surreal. Taking a breath she balanced on the edge of the tub trying to decide what to do next. It had all made so much sense as she was doing it, yet thinking about being here with Dick didn't make sense at all. She was holding her phone, thinking who she could call before realising she had no signal. She did have two texts though.

One from her mom: "Have fun darling! Ryan's missing you! We won't wait up!"

And the second from Logan: "Thanks Mac! Hopefully you can cheer him up, he's had a difficult week, so be gentle. – And now for today's inspirational message: 'Wishing to be friends is quick work, but friendship is a slow ripening fruit.' Aristotle"

Trust Logan.

The choice when it came down to it was simple. Did she wish for Dick's friendship or not? Friends or not, they shared Cassidy, the good and the bad. They would always understand how to hurt one another, that was simple she could walk out now; but there _were_ better uses for shared understanding. She smiled as she remembered how disappointed she had been when she thought Dick was unable to have lunch with her. She could be friends with this Dick, the one who was trying not to be a jackass, she could relax in his company, so maybe it didn't matter that it would take time to fully understand why.

Mac grabbed her bag and headed back out into the sunshine smiling to herself. Just occasionally Logan's 'Inspirational Message' was, well, inspirational and provident instead of cynical and trite.

* * *

**Author's Note: **See the review box ... right there! Write something in it and make me happy! … the next section is pretty much ready to go, so I just need a little encouragement to post it! … thanks! x


	5. Chapter 5 - It Matters To You

**Author's Note:** Thanks heaps for all the reviews! I'm really pleased so many of you are taking the time to respond. Would love to hear your thoughts on this chapter, good or bad! (I pretty much assume anyone who doesn't bother to review is wildly indifferent or hates my writing! ... ok I'm exaggerating, but I would love to read your thoughts!)

Thanks to everyone who's still reading and following! ... hopefully this chapter won't disappoint!

I don't think the next chapter's going to be ready for a couple of days but if there's a good response to this one you never know I may find the time to finish it early!

Still not my creation, all the lovely Rob Thomas, thanks for letting me play with them though!

* * *

**Chapter 5  
**

* * *

Dick was sitting with his back to the veranda, legs dangling in the pool. He was almost done blowing up an air mattress when Mac sat down beside him hugging her legs to her chest. "Where'd you find it?" she asked.

"We left them here." He gestured to the giant rubber ring that was already floating away from them.

"Ah, my precious!" She grinned at him and dropped into the pool to claim her prize. "Jeepers that's cold," she added when she surfaced by the rubber ring.

"It's just cos you're hot… I mean you'll get used to it," He added quickly. "And why do _you_ get the ring?"

"Cos you're _too_ slow," she grinned "if I have to fight you for it, so be it!" She splashed in his direction.

"You owe me CindyMac!" he said sinking into the pool himself.

She grinned "Ok, you can have first pick when we play with my Barbie Dolls."

"You have…?"

"Of course not," Mac laughed. "_Maybe_ I'll let you beat me next time we play Halo."

"Maybe _I_ let you beat me _last_ time we played Halo."

She laughed "Yeah, keep telling yourself that!"

"Do you let your brother win?"

"Nah, he's too young for Halo. He's more Mario Kart, and he doesn't need me to let him win."

* * *

Mac was hanging through the rubber ring, one arm dangling into the water, head resting sleepily on the other, studying Dick. The air mattress he was attempting to sit on had seen better days, and his abs had finally submerged. She shifted her gaze, feeling a little guilty for checking him out - especially as he was doing a reasonable job of keeping his eyes fixed above shoulder level.

"There was a rope swing on that tree" Dick was pointing to the far side of the garden. "We used to try to jump into the pool from it."

Mac laughed, "Aw."

"Hey, we were kids! We'd have tried to swing to the moon if we were allowed on it after dark. He wanted to do everything I did - Cassidy - even when he was tiny. He did too, he always found some way. He was smart," added Dick sadly. "We played, fought, made up, plotted, had fun, and got into trouble. Just regular brothers."

"When did you stop visiting?"

"My aunt died when I was ten, it wasn't the same after that."

"Did you and Cass come back?"

"Yeah, when we were teenagers. We came a few times… but… we'd… we'd really learnt to hurt each other by then - it wasn't so fun. This is the first time in years…" He paused before asking "So Cass never brought you?"

She shook her head. This would have been far too intimate for Cassidy, even without the expectation of sex. "So, how many girls have you brought here over the years?" she asked with a wicked smile.

He looked shocked. "You know the girls I date Macaroni. This isn't them."

No, she couldn't see it either. An expensive hotel, luxurious holiday home, his dad's yacht or whichever bed was nearest - those were the kind of girls Dick dated. "But, not even Madison?"

They'd been together for years, Dick… and Mac's cuckoo twin. Mac tried not to think about Madison any more than necessary - the girl with whom she'd been switched at birth. By rights Madison should have spent yesterday ferrying her younger brother Ryan between engagements - but a mistake at the hospital that sent them home with the wrong families left them living one another's lives. Would she have become spoilt princess Madison with her real parents? No, that seemed unlikely. She hoped.

How different would her life have been with the perfect parents, parents who understood her? But that was a silly way of thinking, she already had the perfect parents, the ones who loved and supported her unconditionally even when they didn't understand her.

"No. This was mine and Cassidy's place."

"Who looks after it?"

"Uh? Mom I guess, well, she pays someone. I think the neighbours? I know they look after the orchard, it joins with theirs."

"She keeps it to remind her of Chloe?"

"No, Chloe left it to me and Cass. Well, I guess it'll be mine now - when I'm twenty-one."

"What will you do with it? It'd make a great holiday hide-away - when you want to get away from everyone."

"Dunno, never really thought about it. You're welcome to borrow it if you want to get away from the parents this summer. Bring Max for a romantic break?"

"No." She couldn't imagine bringing Max to Dick's childhood retreat, let alone Cassidy's. "We're not really in the romantic getaway phase right now."

"But you said things were going well, you told me about your date?"

"Yeah, it was good, we're great when we have something to connect over. It's… I'm just… he doesn't know me - like Piz and Parker - I need to work out how to explain… and if I want to. I guess I have the summer to try."

"Go Pirates!" added Dick sarcastically. "When you work it out let me know - I need pointers. Come on, I'll race you to the end and back" he said relinquishing the sorry excuse for an air mattress.

"There's no need to mock the slow girl, surfer boy," spluttered Mac as she reached the side, just a stroke after Dick.

"Just pacing myself. No point pulling a muscle and letting slow and steady win the race."

He let her dunk him without protest before she pushed herself out of the pool. "Does the shower work?"

"It should, I'll find you a towel."

* * *

Dick had set up the hammocks while she washed out the chlorine. Wrapped in the huge fluffy robe that he'd given her along with the towel she didn't think it would hurt to curl up and close her eyes for just five minutes. Since waking at 5am for the computer lab slot she'd had a long day, and the sound of insects buzzing through the trees was relaxing as the hammock swayed gently.

When she awoke she could hear the sound of typing. She opened her eyes to see Dick sitting in the other hammock, working at his laptop.

"Hey SleepyMac."

"Sorry, how long was I out?"

"About an hour. Was I boring you MacAttack?"

She smiled, "I had a _really_ early morning, and I'm not used to all this poisonous fresh air and sunshine."

"I can drive you home… if you like?"

"No, we're working through the night tomorrow, so I should stay awake as long as you want to entertain me this evening," she yawned. "Did you find the internet?"

"Yeah, thought I'd do some class work - it was that or watch you sleep, and well, writing a paper was less 'scary stalker', so I chose that." He grinned.

Mac pushed herself up so she was facing him, re-tying her robe to avoid flashing him. "Good choice! Even better: next time don't mention the stalker tendencies at all!"

"I'm trying not to be a jackass, I am still a guy though. It's hard not to watch a pretty girl sleep, even a friend."

"Ah, my cue to put on clothes," she said heading indoors.

* * *

Mac was watching him type. "Dick?"

"Yeah?"

"Don't buy any more test papers from Max."

"I'm trying not to have to."

"Not even if you have to. Study, find another way, ask for help."

"Ok… MackyC, you alright?" he sounded worried.

"Yeah, I just don't like…" What didn't she like? '_Max thinking he's better than Dick!_' came the easy thought.

She changed tack, "it's good to get away, have some space to think. Thanks! It's good hearing about Cassidy… before it all went wrong."

"It's good remembering Cass… the way he really was. It's like the media want him to be this choir boy kid who snapped, turned into a psycho and blew up a bus overnight, and that's when they remember he was ever good. He hurt so many of our friends it's just easier for them to think of him as a psycho than remember the good. It's not as simple as that though. He was never one or the other, he was always just my brother, both good and bad."

"He was good at hiding the bad" she said, ruefully. "I mostly saw the good. Until graduation…" she paused, thinking about the Cassidy she knew, "He knew how to get even…"

"He knew how to plot - even after he'd got his revenge it was hard to see what he'd done, that he'd done anything…"

Mac was smiling, remembering the Winter Carnival - the night Cassidy tricked Dick into the backseat of his car with a very pretty _man_…

"… he brought down dad."

… until she wasn't smiling any more. "What happened to Sally?" she asked quietly.

Dick stopped, his mouth open. When he could breathe again he closed his computer and went inside returning with two bottles of water from the refrigerator, he handed one to Mac and went to sit on the veranda steps.

"It's easy to think it was always me hurting him, and I did, I know I did. But anything I did, he did too, he was just less obvious about it. He told you about Sally?"

Mac joined Dick on the steps, leaving him enough room so as not to feel crowded. "Yes and no… I think he lied. It was only just now I remembered he mentioned her at all." She looked over to him, "You were going to punch him at Winter Carnival; he said 'Remember Sally' - you stopped, walked away."

"You asked about it?"

"Yeah, he said she was some girl from camp. But that was the other Sally; he was talking about your dog?"

"Yes."

Mac could feel her heart thumping in her chest.

Dick caught her gaze. "Mac, he killed a dozen people, destroyed my family, raped Veronica, and… he… you…" Dick gestured to Mac, "Does it matter what he did to my dog?"

"It matters to you."

He broke eye contact, staring off into the trees. "She was _my_ dog."

"It matters Dick."

He took a deep breath, "He killed her. Not in a psycho axe murder kind of way, that wasn't Cass, he was more subtle. He made my mom think Sal attacked him - she did attack him, but he made her do it. Sal wasn't like that. Mom had Sally put to sleep, and Cassidy got to stay with mom for the rest of the summer while he picked his wounds so they took longer to heal."

Mac was lost for words… "Why?"

"I was _really_ mean to him Mac… we knew how to hurt each other _way_ before Sally… Sal was the worst though, he scared me, proved he could really hurt me and get away with it. But… it wasn't really like that. I don't think hurting me was the real reason, not now, not anymore." Dick blinked fighting the tears. "He was twelve, it was the year he played little league for Woody Goodman. He was supposed to go to baseball camp that summer."

Mac could feel the tears pooling in her eyes, overflowing. He turned to look at her.

"I'm sorry Mackers, I didn't mean to upset you."

"Did… did you tell your parents?"

"No MackyC. They don't get how Cass worked."

"Did you tell…"

"No… just you." Dick turned to look out onto the garden again. "He was a terrified little kid, and his cry for help scared me so much I didn't notice he needed a big brother. We got past it, we were friends when we weren't hurting each another, but he used Sally whenever he wanted to shock me after that. It hurt every time, but it hurts more now I know he was thinking of Woody - comparing me to Woody."

She reached out to hold his hand, but she let him cry, knowing he was crying for the little brother he had lost so many years earlier, the little brother he was unable to help.

Mac's tears were for both brothers, the young Cassidy who was beyond help before she ever knew him, and Dick whose heart would continue to break over Cassidy for a lifetime.

She could tell Dick it wasn't his fault, it wasn't his place to save Cassidy, but he knew that already. It wouldn't stop him wishing things had been different, that he had been strong enough to protect them both from daemons he could never have seen.

They sat in silence, as fluffy white clouds drifted across the sky, and the shadows of the trees grew slowly longer. Until eventually Dick rose, still holding Mac's hand, inviting her to join him.

"Thanks CindyMac. I should have come back sooner, but it was good to come with you."

He smiled lopsidedly, his mood lightened, "So Macadoodle, have you decided how you're going to cheer me up? Logan usually goes with a booze, strip club, surfing combo. Just don't tell Ronnie about the strip club part, although being Ronnie I'm sure she knows the _moment_ he looks at a strip club."

"No?" He asked. He was grinning properly now as he looked her up and down. "Of course there _are_ other options available to you that Logan doesn't have _access_ to." Mac was just considering slapping him when he added, "I mean baking me cookies, braiding my hair and engaging in pillow-fights, they aren't really his thing, but I'm willing to give them a go." He shrugged.

"Are you trying to make me smile?" she asked suppressing a grin.

"Well, it worked," he squeezed her hand, kissed her on the forehead and headed inside. "I'm hungry, and as I believe cookies are off the menu I guess I'm going to have to see what's left of the picnic."

She shook her head and followed him, relieved he'd had a chance to sit and think before his natural good humour overtook again to cushion him from the pain.

"Of course if you think of any other ways to entertain me Mackers you're welcome to submit your ideas." He smirked, "I'm always open to submission."

"Gross" she said, but she smiled, joined him at the kitchen counter and grabbed the last samosa.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Look, a review box … right there! … I'd love to know what you think of this chapter! … hopefully I'll have the next one finished soon!


	6. Chapter 6 - Now I See What Happened

**Author's Note: **Wowsers, thanks guys for a really fab response to the previous chapter! … very glad so many of you enjoyed it enough to read, respond, review and follow! You all made me smile!

Special thanks to BeWitchingRedhead36  u/3184342/BeWitchingRedhead36 for all the extra encouragement I needed to finish this chapter. If you haven't already you should totally read her MaDi stories as she has the most amazing writing style!

Looking forward to seeing what you all think of the following chapter! … sorry I didn't get around to finishing it sooner, it was a lot harder to write than I expected, but hopefully the finished product is worth the extra time it took … at least I don't hate it now, and if you don't hate it I'd love to know! … (if you do hate it please feel free to share that as well!)

Still not mine! … and while I'm writing disclaimers I should make it clear that the basis of the idea for the previous chapter's "Remember Sally" story was from a Rob Thomas' interview.

* * *

**Chapter 6**

* * *

Just a couple of hours into their overnight computer slot everything had come crashing to a halt. Mac hadn't seen Simon pissed before, but there was nothing the technicians could do, and even Simon shouting wouldn't help. The spare part wouldn't be at Hearst until the following morning, so that was that. The supercomputer was shut down for the night, and Mac was free to go to the bar with the guys, or not. She chose not.

After a brief coffee with Max earlier in the day, she realised they desperately needed to talk, to reconnect, and with the supercomputer out of action she had nowhere to be till morning. He'd been jittery, something about a programming problem he needed help with; she'd been trying to work out why things weren't working: they needed time together. They'd barely seen one another all week, and time apart was doing them no good.

"Mac, Mac. Wait up!" Weevil and another maintenance guy were manoeuvring a large trolley up the ramp to the building. "That guy still bugging you?"

"Didn't get a chance today. Feel free to keep dropping by though. Doesn't hurt to remind him I have friends with _edge_," she grinned.

"He's lucky V and her friend Mr Sparky ain't around."

"Yeah!"

"No Dick today?"

"Nope, no lost bets. Hoping for some quality time with my boyfriend."

"Geeky guy, glasses, short dark hair? Goes by the name of Max?"

"That's the one! You know him?"

"Didn't, till yesterday. And I didn't know you were the girl he was talking about. He said you were a computer nerd, working on the supercomputer. Two and two… and here we are. Hey, Mac and Max, that's gotta get confusing, or do you have like cute pet names for each other?"

"Nope, just Mac and Max. Sorry Weevil, is this going somewhere?" she could see Weevil's colleague growing impatient.

He looked back to the trolley, "Err, no. I'll be around if you need me!"

She laughed, "Thanks!"

* * *

Mac knocked at Max's door. She wasn't sure what she was going to say, but she knew this was crunch time - time to commit or time to walk away. Staring at the door for the past five minutes hadn't helped her decide what to say, but she could hear footsteps on the stairs below getting closer.

"It's open," he sounded depressed.

"Hi"

"Mac!" he was surprised. He jumped up from the couch where he'd been laying, drinking beer and eating pizza. "I wasn't expecting you, aren't you…?"

"Yeah, we finished early." She paused, deciding how to begin…

"I think we need to talk…"

The footsteps from the stairs had made their way along the hall, and stopped by the still open door. "You really don't. He already knows Mac!" drawled Wendy in a sing-song voice. "He's known for days."

Max groaned.

"What? What is she doing here?" demanded Mac of a shocked Max. Oh boy did they have problems, if Wendy was back in his life!

Wendy worked her way into the room dropped her purse on the counter and perched on a barstool. "Oh, don't get all high and mighty. I'm just supporting my _friend_. You're the one having the _affair_. I just can't believe he hasn't got round to ditching you yet."

Mac was furious. "Max is entertaining you, his 'ex-hooker ex', and you are accusing _me_ of having an affair?" This certainly wasn't the conversation she had been preparing for.

Mac looked to Max for answers, but Wendy continued in her simpering voice. "I saw you_…_ _kissing_ some guy after you spent the night with him. Max didn't believe me, he thought you were a good little girl, he thought _I_ was trying to cause trouble - till he saw the valet receipt you kept from the Grand, signed by tall dumb and blonde himself. Really, I thought you were friends with the _great_ Veronica Mars, hasn't she taught you never to leave a paper trail?"

Mac was stunned, "But, I'm not…"

"I even saw you together, drinking coffee," added Max. "But I didn't think it would be Dick. Who'd have believed? You and that dumb jerk…"

"I'm not cheating Max."

"So who were you with yesterday?" he demanded.

"Don't pretend like you didn't see me," Wendy was enjoying this far too much. "I tried enticing blondie away, but he wasn't having any of it, he even told me he had a date with you."

"We had lunch. _We're_ just friends…"

Wendy cut her off… "Some lunch, you went off in his car and left yours in the parking lot _all_ day." She was just being smug now.

"You told me yourself you thought he was a jerk!"

"No, you called him a jerk, I just didn't disagree. Are you asking Wendy to leave so we can talk? Or are _we_ done?"

"I think you're _done_," smirked Wendy, as she walked across the room, wrapped herself around Max, and stuck her tongue down his throat.

Mac's brain was still whirling. She hadn't moved by the time Wendy let Max up for air. "Why didn't you just ask me about the valet receipt when you found it? You've had days to ask? No, stupid question, obviously you didn't want me to find out you were seeing Wendy again."

Max made to move towards her but Wendy was holding him tight. "I… I needed you…" he said lamely looking back and forth between Wendy and Mac.

"No Max, looks like Wendy has this covered. Just… how long have you been cheating on me?"

"Oh _Mac_," simpered Wendy. "He hasn't _cheated_ on you. You said it _yourself_, we're _just friends_. Secret liaisons, lunches and lying, that's not _cheating_." She paused before continuing, "But no, you're a _girl_, you know better. You know it hurts, you _know_ sneaking around and lying to your boyfriend is wrong, and you know you deserve this."

Mac felt like she'd been slapped, was Wendy right? Had she cheated on Max?

Max pushed Wendy onto the couch. "Just shut up for a moment, let me talk to her."

But Mac had re-discovered her balance. Decided this wasn't a relationship she wanted to salvage. "Don't bother, Wendy's right. _We_ are done."

"Mac, Mac… we should talk…" Max half heartedly trailed her down the corridor, but by the time she reached her car he was nowhere to be seen.

* * *

"So let me get this straight…" Logan was enjoying himself. "Cos we _are_ going to be talking about this for a long time to come, and, you know, I just want to make _certain_ that I'm mocking you for all the right reasons.

Mac was laying on his couch, staring up at the ceiling, trying not to laugh at the absurdity of it all. The room wasn't spinning yet: but she had managed four shots of vodka before Logan had removed the bottle and morose laughter had dragged her into the horizontal. _Yeah_, vodka had been a mistake.

She banged her head against the couch. Logan took this as a sign he could continue. "So, Max let Wendy dump you? _You_ let Wendy dump you - even though Max was cheating on you _and_ you already had doubts about the relationship before knocking on the door?"

"Yeah, I know, I was just a little shocked ok? I would have got around to it!"

"Then… Max's 'ex-hooker ex' beat you into a corner, where she steals _your_ boyfriend, and yet she still makes you believe _you_ cheated on him in the first place?"

"No… yes. Oh god!" Mac groaned putting her arm across her face.

"And," Logan paused for effect. "The best bit. My favourite part of this story. The cherry if you will… It turns out, you cheated on Max with Dick. Dick Casablancas. You know, Dick my roommate."

"No, see, nothing happened with Dick."

"Which kind of nothing?"

"The kind where absolutely nothing happened."

"Either you cheated or you didn't, and teasing aside I think it's a fairly safe bet you didn't."

She sighed. "It's a girl thing, you wouldn't understand."

"Shoot, I knew I should have pinched the anatomically correct dolls from my psyche professor's office!"

Mac grinned at the thought: trust Logan to have considered pinching them. Not that she needed anatomically correct dolls to explain that nothing happened. "No really. Nothing happened. We're just… we're working out how to be friends."

"Sorry, I don't get it. _We're_ friends, and nobody cares!"

"Veronica and Max know we're friends… V _made_ me come over, she said I needed company and you'd mock me out of my funk. I'm schooling you in girl code in return."

He groaned raising his eyes to the ceiling, "Are you there God? It's me, Logan?" No answer. "So?"

"Dick's different. I lied to Max about him," she tensed up remembering what Max had said about Dick, remembering that she may once have agreed with him. "Max thinks Dick's a jerk, and I didn't get around to telling him otherwise. I didn't tell him I'd been… seeing Dick."

"By _seeing_ you mean?"

"Do you think we can get past this? Nothing happened Logan, just… I lied to Max about us hanging out."

"Lying isn't cheating."

"You are _so_ not a girl."

"See, anatomically correct dolls would have helped me clear _that_ up a lot sooner!"

Veronica was right, laughing was good.

How could she explain it in a way that Logan would understand? "Have you ever cheated on Veronica?"

"No, of course not."

Mac propped herself up on her elbows, she was studying his face intently. He should have been more suspicious of the evil glint in her eye. "So, tell me about Madison?"

"That wasn't cheating…"

But Mac could see her point sinking in. If it weren't for Madison, well, who knows… Logan and Veronica were epic, but epic was on hold for the time being, and Madison was no small part of the reason. They had been on a break when Logan and Madison ended up in bed, but there are some things that girls find hard to forgive, and Madison was the one that haunted Veronica. The one that had caused their most recent split.

"Girl code is… intense!"

"Well, pay attention and maybe next time you won't need to throw an 'off again' pity party."

He grinned, "No one writes songs about the relationships that come easy."

"Did that ease the pain when she was dating Piz?"

"Only ten weeks to go before she's back in Neptune and I can screw up again."

"Like you can't screw up from afar."

"You're such a comfort Mac."

"Hey, you're supposed to be comforting me! I'm the screw up here. So," she grinned, "when do we get to the strippers? That's how it goes right, booze, strippers, surfing?"

"I think you picked up the wrong handbook, that's bro code."

"Wanna braid my hair?"

"No, but you need something to soak up the vodka and I _can_ do ice cream? That's… 'Accidentally cheated with Dick Casablancas' food, right?" Logan chuckled to himself as he grabbed the phone.

"Yeah, mock away Mr 'Accidentally cheated despite not technically even being with Veronica at the time,'" _Was that too mean?_ The alcohol was finally catching up with her; perhaps something to eat would be good. She propped herself up again and apologised, "Sorry, what I meant to say was sorbet please, mango sorbet! And, do you think they have liquorice?"

A movement in the entryway caught her eye, "Dick!" _How long had he been standing there with that goofy grin?_

"Hi honey, I'm home! Not that I'm complaining, but aren't you supposed to be in some marathon all night Halo battle with the super computer?"

After grabbing a cold beer from the fridge, he slid onto the couch, deftly positioning himself beneath her raised shoulders. She gave him her 'are you serious' look and sat up, but as the room spun uncooperatively she rearranged the cushions between herself and Dick, and settled back down against him.

"Global Thermonuclear War! And no, they had to shut him down for the night, guess you'll have to do instead. Logan's been plying me with vodka, so you may even have a chance of winning - you know, without me letting you."

Logan was staring at them, "Ok, _now_ I see what happened," he said pointedly. She threw one of her cushions at him.

"Ah, pillow-fight! Perhaps girl code isn't so bad after all," but instead of throwing it back he picked up the remote and scrolled through the movie menu.

"So, what's this about Logan cheating? Who'd he do this time? My Step-mom? My one long term Girlfriend? No wait, he's been there done them. Better not be my sister-in-law dude, she's like eleven."

"She's not _like_ eleven, she _is_ eleven. Your wife sends her regards. And no, _I_ didn't cheat."

"So…" Dick tried changing the subject, "_What_ are we watching?"

"Nothing, I think you were just gonna tell me about your wife!"

"Oh goody, the truth or dare portion of our evening. Now _this_ is what I've been waiting for." Logan was grinning broadly as he continued. "I choose dare, I assume you'll be telling us why you're here Mac, or would you prefer dare as well?"

She was about to throw another cushion in his direction when Logan asked if she wanted to lose all of them? No, she really didn't, she was quite happy laying here - ok, so laying against Dick's thigh. But there was a line, and she didn't need to complicate life by getting _any_ closer to that line. "_So_, your _wife_?"

"Thanks bro…"

"Sorry, you brought her up though Dick…"

He sighed, "Yeah… you know, usual story: Pixie-Spy sat me down, told me this lovely lil tale 'bout how my best friend slept with my ex; I went a bit loopy; met hot girl; tricked mopey best friend into babysitting her kid sister; went to Vegas; got married; found out… um… she wasn't the _one_; came home; begged for an annulment; and realised I was a jackass." He paused… "No comment?"

"Maybe tomorrow when the room stops spinning."

"On the plus side, Logan has a new BFF come gaming buddy. Legend of Zelda, Mario Kart, that's his thing these days."

"I have dibs on Princess Peach. And she's not bad, for a kid - I don't have to let her win anymore."

"My kid brother beats me all the time."

"Cass always won," added Dick.

Mac may have had more vodka than was good for her, but she still spotted Logan freeze at the mention of Cassidy. She couldn't decide why. Was he worried for her, wondering if once again she'd leave the hotel in a catatonic state? Worried for Dick, thinking he'd be shocked back into his destructive jackass mode? Or just reminded himself of that horrific night just over a year ago when he had witnessed Cassidy terrorising Veronica before jumping from the roof? It was easy to forget how hard that evening had been for Logan. He not only had to deal with the effect of Cassidy's death on his best friend and girlfriend, he'd also had to deal with the murder of his father. A murder everyone seemed pleased to forget as quickly as possible. _Maybe it was all three?_

Mac absently took Dick's hand from the back of the couch and wrapped his arm across her waist. "Cassidy was like a year and a half younger than you? That hardly counts as being beaten by a kid. Logan and I have to deal with losing to eleven year olds. It's like a whole new generation."

"Nearly two years younger - Cassidy. He'd have been eighteen this Sunday." Dick's voice was surprisingly calm.

Ok, that was what Logan was worried about… how had she forgotten his birthday? _No_… she realised she had never known it.

She could feel Dick breathing deeply, the rise and fall of her chest matching his. She squeezed his hand. "If you want some company I can be here. Or are you and Logan surfing all day?"

Logan was still frozen, his eyes bouncing between herself and Dick; perhaps worried that any other movement would shatter the moment releasing chaos. But Dick's voice remained calm, "We're surfing - just not all day. I have to have lunch with Dad. I can meet up with you after if you like, unless you have to be with Max or your family or something."

_Damn, why was the room still spinning?_ Mac sat up. She couldn't tell Dick she'd split with her boyfriend while he had his arm wrapped around her. _Why had she let herself get so comfortable?_

"Nope, no Max. We broke up," she looked to Logan for assistance, but he was studiously investigating the movie menu again. "Logan's _supposed_ to be helping me see the funny side."

"You decided it wasn't working?"

"Not exactly… it's possible Wendy did the actual ditching… it was all a bit of a blur."

"The _stripper_ Wendy?"

"Yeah, well, ex-hooker really. She's Max's ex, although not really what you'd call an ex any more. She kind of convinced him I was cheating, and well, I guess he thought he was getting his own back."

"Um, I told her we had a date."

"That probably didn't help, but no, I lied to him well before that, we just weren't working, it never really worked." She turned back to Logan, "Look, can we please get back to mocking me or at least let me have the vodka again? The slow humiliation will take too long. Put me out of my misery!"

Logan grinned, "Alcohol poisoning is never as swift as you'd like, it may take a week or two for your liver to shut down, but who knows how long this kind of shame will endure. So, time for the strip club?"

She chuckled, "Do you mind if we skip the strippers? I think I've seen enough of Wendy for one day."

"Yeah, bumping into her naked probably wouldn't help."

She opened her mouth to admonish a teasing Logan for that disturbing mental image, but nothing came out. Before she could recover her composure they were interrupted by a knock at the door.

He winked, "Saved by the ice-cream."

"Sorbet! And did they find liquorice?"

While Logan investigated the sugar coma on a trolley, Dick caught her eye, and murmured, "You ok CindyMac?"

"Yeah" she nodded. "Just didn't want to go home, needed distracting - with Veronica and Parker away, you two get to step up…"

"Girl's night?"

"Something like that!" She paused investigating his face for a moment, wondering how he was dealing with the Cassidy stuff, "You ok?"

He nodded almost imperceptibly, "Yesterday helped. So, braiding hair, plotting Max's downfall, nearly naked pillow fights, that kind of thing?"

"I was thinking alcohol, movies and video games, but I can teach Logan to braid your hair if you prefer?"

"Maybe later Mackers."

* * *

**Author's Note: **Will be super chuffed if you review … tis that box right there … just write something, anything, and you will make me smile! And, if this chapter made you smile that seems like a pretty fair deal! x


	7. Chapter 7 - That Wasn't Your Ass

**Author's Note:** Thanks guys! … you rock … well, you're MaDi fans, of course you rock! … I really cannot tell you how much I appreciate all the reviews and follows though!

I'd love to know what you make of this chapter … and I'd love to know what you think of the slow build relationship I'm going for in this story.

… and special thanks to BeWitchingRedhead36 u/3184342/ again for some fantastic support and encouragement … hopefully I can help encourage her to complete the next chapter of her MaDi story very soon!

Still not mine, all Rob Thomas' marvellous creation, I'm just playing with them!

* * *

**Chapter 7**

* * *

"Sure?" asked Logan.

"I'm not sleepy yet… And I can always pinch Dick's bed if the couch is _that_ bad."

"But then you _would_ run the risk of him joining you half way through the night. Just wake him up and send him to bed when he starts snoring… or drooling."

Mac laughed. Dick looked so innocent curled up next to her, twisted in a blanket, his blond mop of hair resting on the cushion by her hip. "Thanks. I needed this."

"Any time Mac, it's going to be a long summer, and…" the sentence trailed off. "I've put Veronica's pyjamas in the bathroom for you, there's a new toothbrush in the cabinet, and plenty of towels. That is the best thing about living in a hotel, there's always fresh towels and fluffy robes!"

"And room service, and valet service, and maid service, and laundry service, and a chef; and do they help you with your homework?" Mac smirked.

Logan laughed, "Wallace did persuade someone to get us tongue depressors and Koosh balls when we were working on a science project this one time."

"Wallace?" she was disbelieving.

"Well, he was here… And you did the 'Grade My Ass' project for me." Logan smiled, maybe he'd worked out what he was trying to say earlier, "It's good to have friends Mac. Especially when you need mocking. It's good having you here."

"Thanks Logan."

He yawned, "Don't let Dick drink any more, remember to drink plenty of water, and don't stay up too late!"

She grinned at the parental lecture. "I won't… Just want to strip the links from our Ass site to Max's cheating site. And resist the urge to take him offline while I'm at it," she muttered as her computer screen came to life.

An evening of mocking banter had helped shift Mac from introspection and self doubt to indignation and… not revenge, well not that she was willing to admit, but maybe anger. Dick had reminded her: She barely recognised Wendy when they'd run into her before their picnic, so how exactly had Wendy recognised her outside the Grand collecting her car on Monday morning? Had Wendy been stalking her for some time? Or had Max and Wendy been in contact well before this past week? Neither option was particularly pleasing.

Mac's fingers tip tapped their way across the internet; she'd edit the links on 'Grade My Ass' soon enough, but her first destination was more personal - Max's laptop. Luckily it was switched on, she didn't _even_ have to hack her way in, he had given her access weeks ago when she helped fix a problem.

Mac dismissed the impulse to switch on his webcam, she didn't need to know what Max was doing, what he was doing to Wendy, but she did want to delete the photos. Nothing too risqué she wasn't stupid, it was mostly the ones _she'd_ put online - Grade My Ass of course. Mac and Max had bonded while building the site for Logan, and in that first flush of lust it had been easy to succumb to temptation.

As Mac flicked through the folders on Max's computer, something caught her eye… oh well too late, she could always go back and check… right now she was into his photos, quickly opening each to see she was deleting the right ones. Luckily Parker had never persuaded her of the need for skimpy underwear, and Mac certainly wasn't one to pose nude, so she was well covered up in her 'Ass' photos. Ok, there was one without her bra - but her breasts were covered by her arm, and that photo was mostly about the grin on her face as she'd reached to take her camera from Max and end their photo session.

"Shit Mac!" Dick pushed himself up from the cushion where she thought he'd been asleep.

_Oh crap!_ How long had he been awake? Well… long enough to see the photo of her without her bra that was still on her screen! She closed her computer and bit her lip, trying to think what to say. _That was stupid!_ How could she have forgotten she was doing this in Dick's eye line?

"I'm sorry, I… I didn't realise it was you Mackers… I thought you were just working on Grade…"

"… My Ass?"

"That _wasn't_ your ass MackyC."

"I'm betting you _aced_ Sex Ed!" she bit back.

Dick looked embarrassed, must have been embarrassed if he didn't have a snappy response for _that_… _oh crap_ - he was sweet when he was embarrassed.

She smiled, "Come on, not even a 'That's what she said' joke?"

"I'm sorry… I didn't mean to," he waved his hands at her computer. "What are you even doing looking at naked photos right now?" Was he angry? He definitely sounded agitated.

"Um… hacking into Max's computer to delete stuff?"

"Oh… yeah… that makes sense," he finally met her gaze, grinning sheepishly.

"I thought you were asleep," she shrugged apologetically.

"I was… I guess there are worse ways to wake up." He was doing a good job of sounding huffy as he pummelled the cushion and lay back down.

"Thanks!" she rolled her eyes. She had been proud of that photo, she knew she looked good in it, she had been relaxed, happy, finally liberated - she'd have preferred Dick hadn't seen it, but at least his reaction wasn't that of his old jackass self. "Do you mind if I carry on? I just need to delete them before Max thinks to secure his laptop."

"Go for it Macalicious."

"Eyes shut?"

"If you like… but… I've got a pretty good memory Macchiato, and it's not like you can hack into my brain and delete a mental image."

Mac refrained from pointing out just how much of a relief it was that she couldn't wander through his brain. Who knew what was lurking in the seedier corners - removing one nearly naked photo would be the least of her worries. As she flipped open her laptop to delete the photo in question she wondered what it was that had caught her eye earlier, what was Max up to that had intrigued her as she was wandering through his computer?

A quick scan through the folder list and she found it again… 'Eli Navarro' … What was Max doing with a folder dedicated to Weevil? It seemed to be related to the Hearst ID scam that Weevil had been accused of, but Max hadn't been involved in that surely? Mac copied the folder over to a flash drive, along with another titled 'IDs' and all the email and files from the past week. She would have to have a proper look at a more convenient time.

When Dick made a show of reaching blindly for the bag of liquorice by her knee she relented. "Enough with the groping, you can open your eyes," she moved his hand to the sweets.

"Sorry Macadoodle, I was distracted, can't seem to get this totally hot pic out of my brain."

She smiled - glad he couldn't see her reaction - and turned her attentions to 'Grade My Ass', her first stop was to remove her own photos. She didn't bother asking Dick to look away; even if he hadn't already seen the 'Ass' photos on Max's computer, none of these photos were half as intimate as the one he had already seen.

"B, you got a B?"

"B plus Dick."

"Should have been at least an A minus." He actually sounded offended on her behalf.

"Well, if you'd found them earlier you could have done something about it." She hit delete. "Too late now."

"It was more fun this way," he grinned turning onto his back, hooking his legs over the back of the couch and staring up at the ceiling. "Logan went to bed?"

"Yeah, it's late." Mac had moved on to erasing the links between Grade My Ass and Max's 'Study Guide' site. In reality she was doing Max a favour, more visitors to his site greatly increased the likelihood of if him being busted and shut down, but all she wanted was for him to be out of her life right now, and this was something she needed to do for herself. "You should go as well Dick."

"I'm not sleeping much right now."

"Cassidy?" she asked reaching for the liquorice.

"Yeah. The anniversary, his birthday, my dad. I screwed up finals."

"You're catching up though?"

"Yeah, Logan's been good… I know you came over cos of Max, but you should come more often - it was good for Logan - girl talk!"

She smiled, but still replied with her natural sarcasm, "Thanks… I should arrange to get dumped by my ex's ex-hooker once a week!"

"You know what I mean… How long have you and Logan been friends?"

"We didn't swap bracelets or anything… It just happened - we spent time together when he was with Parker. Wouldn't have guessed it in High School, but shocker, we actually get along."

"We couldn't have been friends in High School. I was a jerk…" he paused.

"If you're waiting for me to deny that we will here be a while."

"I should have given you and Cass a break…"

"Yeah!" she responded - somewhat unfairly, her problems with Cassidy hadn't been Dick's fault. "But we aren't in High School anymore Dick… _We_ are allowed to be friends out in the real world."

They sat in silence for a while as she finished her work on 'Grade My Ass'. She checked her email, nothing exciting, just Neil with some notes from the supercomputer project, a message from Kane Software with details for the internship she was starting on Monday, and a good morning message from Wallace in Uganda. She checked her proxy was working properly and logged into the private account. Another photo, a beautiful blond curly haired toddler. The note just said, "Wish you were here."

He had made contact over Christmas break, when a small parcel arrived in the post at her parents' home; an odd Christmas present, a small green _familiar_ flash drive. Just one file - an email address, password, and instructions to pass the photos to her sister. Mac didn't have a sister, well, not one that _he_ knew about… but it wasn't Mac's sister he was thinking of.

She switched out the photo's file information to make it look like she'd taken it herself, forwarded it to her phone, and closed her computer.

"You asleep?" she asked.

"Just thinking."

"About High School?"

"About friends CindyMac…" He swung his legs off the back of the couch and sat up. "Are you staying over?"

"Yeah, the parent's aren't expecting me till morning."

"You can take my bed if you like, I thought I'd play Halo for a bit…"

"How's about you set it up, while I get changed. Then just maybe I'll let you win."

* * *

Dick's face was a picture when she returned, his mouth opening and closing each time he thought of something to say then decided the better of it.

"Yeah, that's pretty much what I thought too," she said slumping down on the couch. "Can we just not say it?"

The pyjama bottoms were fine, probably an old pair of Logan's - long, but a nice sensible grey. The top however… Well, Veronica wasn't a girly girl, the Taser saw to that, but occasionally her clothes said otherwise. And while Mac wasn't overly blessed in the boob department, she was positively voluptuous in comparison to Veronica.

"Um, Pink's not really your colour," he grinned. "Stay there!"

When he returned from his room with a dark grey t-shirt Mac was suspicious, "_Thanks_… but is one of your misogynistic offering's going to be an improvement?"

"Strong words Mackers, I'm hurt. Come on, trust me…"

He unfolded the shirt so she could see what it said. She grinned reluctantly, yeah, this was definitely more her - it simply stated 'Meh', a sound response for most situations. He handed it over and turned around pointedly. Did he expect her to change in the middle of his living room? _Yeah, probably._

"Seriously MackyC, you can trust me. I'm not turning round till you tell me. I even have my eyes shut. I can stay like this all night. It's not like I'd stand a chance of beating you at Halo if I cop an eye full, so probably best I think of you as Medusa right now, you know, turn a guy to stone and all; and you can't wear that top of Ronnie's either, it is totally disconcerting…"

Dick maintained his monologue as Mac rolled her eyes and switched tops. The 'Meh' shirt was a definite improvement, it swamped her, but she was much more comfortable than in Veronica's clingy pink top.

"… of course it's not like I didn't already have a naked photo of you burned into my brain, so if my game's a little off then it's all your fault for distracting me with your hot bod; and I would like to point out, _that_ was entirely your own fault, I was just snoozing minding my own business attracted by the pretty flashing images on the screen, I didn't even go looking for your…" He was interrupted by a cushion to the face. "Ok… maybe I deserved that. But, do that again when I turn around and you had _better_ be ready for the pillow fight that follows."

"Um, just checking you really had your eyes shut… Halo?" she asked innocently. Things were good with Dick, and the barely suppressed sexual tension of a pillow fight could only freak her out and ruin this friendship - that kind of restraint showed real personal growth from Dick - the boy who not so long ago had tried to drunk kiss her on the beach after a half hearted apology.

"I get to open my eyes right?"

"Yes, you can turn around."

"See, that's much better MackyC" he waved at her t-shirt as he bounced onto the couch and picked up his controller. "Just let me know when you're up for that pillow fight and _I_ will be there."

Smacking him in the face with a cushion obviously wasn't an option, so Mac settled for putting him in his place on the battlefield.

* * *

When Mac paused the game to get a bottle of water from the refrigerator Dick stretched back into the couch, pulling one of the blankets around him.

"Can I borrow a real pillow?"

"Sure Mackster…" he waved in the direction of his room.

She retrieved two - one for herself, one for him. Mac placed her pillow in the corner of the two couch sections and hugged a blanket around herself as she yawned. "That is so not a teenage boy's bedroom… whatever happened to the surfboard, the guitar, the teenage boy smell? And why aren't there posters covering every available inch of wall?"

Dick placed his pillow down by hers and sank into it. "Cassidy let you into my room?" he was annoyed.

"No… I walked by, like twice?" She chuckled, of all the things Cassidy did that hardly seemed like something to get worked up over.

"Good, I'd ki…" The time for Dick to get even with his brother had long gone - Dick would never, could never again exact revenge for the small slights of brotherhood, and the magnitude of Cassidy's crimes made even hyperbole insignificant by comparison.

"Me and Cass… you weren't the problem Dick. You could have gone easier on us, but you gave him the excuse he wanted - he didn't want me getting close."

"I was jealous," he said quietly.

She stopped breathing, _What?_ She screamed inside her head. Dick Casablancas was not jealous of his little brother dating her?

"I mean you took Cass from me."

_Oh!_ … that made more sense…

"My mom left, my dad left, Madison moved on, even Kendall went off with my _best_ friend… and then you showed up to take away my little brother."

She reached out to wriggle her hand beneath his.

"I didn't realise I lost him way before that… I thought… I want to visit his grave… on Sunday… will you come?"

Her breathing caught.

"I mean you don't have to… I don't… I can't ask Logan… he… it's too much for him… he can't get over what Cassidy did to Ronnie… what _we_ did to Ronnie…"

"I'll come… Dick I thought he was cremated?"

"He was, but mom…" Dick was circling his thumb distractedly across her palm, tickling her wrist. "I guess she was feeling guilty cos she didn't come to his funeral - anyhow, when she finally came back she had us bury his ashes. You weren't there - at his funeral?"

"No - it was too soon. I was… I was really messed up. My Dad went… I didn't even know it was his funeral, I didn't think to ask. I'm sorry…"

"There weren't many people. Just me and Logan. Mom was in Europe, and Dad was hiding from the feds. A few people came to stare. I mean, I'm glad your dad came, I didn't know, no-one told me he came… Thanks…"

"You don't want to go with your dad?"

"No MackyC."

"We can go after your lunch."

Dick let go of her hand, pulling the blanket around him. "He wanted to love you - Cassidy."

Her breathing hitched again, her hand felt naked without the comforting caress, and she couldn't decide if it hurt more coming to terms with the knowledge that Cassidy had never loved her, or knowing her first love had been a killer.

"He could see how cool you were. Took me years to notice, and we've been in the same grade forever."

"It's ok," she yawned, "I thought you were a jerk. High School distorts people. High School messed us up."

"_Go Pirates!_"

When she stirred in the night, he was holding her hand again, but when Logan woke her the following morning Dick was already up, having breakfast on the balcony.

"You're welcome to stay Mac, sleep as long as you like, but you said your parents were expecting you?"

"Thanks Logan" she yawned, "It's ok, I can sleep at home, they think I spent the night in the computer lab."

"Instead you stayed up destroying Max's website and playing Halo?"

She grinned, "I left his website, just took down the links from ours. But we must have forgotten about Halo…"

Their game was still paused, half way through - abandoned as they drifted into sleep discussing Cassidy.

* * *

**Author's Note: **Hey, look, a review box … they work sooo much better when they are filled in! … *grins* … and if you are enjoying this story and want to read more a review, even a short one, will help encourage me to continue writing!


	8. Chapter 8 - Wrapped in Cellophane

**Author's Note:** Thanks guys! … I'm really chuffed with the response this story has received so far, it's been a huge encouragement for me and has helped enormously to make me want to continue to writing it! Thanks for the follows, reviews and favourites … and thanks to everyone who's continuing to read along! As ever I'd love to know what you think of this chapter!

It may be a couple of weeks before the next update as I'm away next week, but please feel free to review/PM/beg for more in my absence … it'll make me feel loved and I never did think my head was large enough!

… BeWitchingRedhead36  u/3184342/ has been an enormous encouragement again and I hope you all stopped by to read the update she posted to her MaDi story!

… my favourite MaDi story of the week? … The ABCs of Mac and Dick  s/6586177/1/The-ABCs-of-Mac-and-Dick by Jenwin23  u/1037990/jenwin23 ... if you've not already read it go read! … if you have re-read it, it's worth it! … if you'd like to suggest a MaDi story for me to add to my list of things I should read please feel free!

Still not mine, all Rob Thomas' marvellous creation, I'm just playing with them, I may even give them back some day!

* * *

**Chapter 8**

* * *

"Get over it Logan, I let you pay for ridiculously expensive room service, you can let me buy you lunch in return." Mac had picked a booth by the window and through their hurried meal; her gaze barely left the exclusive double doors across the road, behind which Dick was meeting his dad. She was feeling apprehensive - tetchy. "Or do you get off on waving your black AmEx card at minimum wage employees _just_ to buy a sandwich?"

"Well, I _do_ have a reputation to uphold," smirked Logan with a mock salute to a table of giggling girls being seated at the back of the diner. "Heir to _the_ Aaron Echolls, one of Hollywood's brightest stars - adulterer, cradle robber, murderer, fucking fantastic father, executed just moments after evading justice. I wouldn't want to subvert my fans' expectations."

Mac turned back to Logan - sorry her strained mood had infected him as well. Logan had suggested they have lunch: 'To support Dick, be around in case anything goes wrong' - his words. The searching look in his eye when they'd met and his tentative probing questions suggested he was equally worried about her. Dancing around the issue hadn't helped though - it had just served to put them both on edge, and prove his worries well founded.

"They went to High School with us," she tried to sound calm as she glanced at the girls.

"Super, they already know I'm a psychotic jackass, I don't even have to throw anyone across the room. My reputation is safe…"

She could hear her old nickname on their lips and realised they were talking about her. _Ghostworld_ - Dick hadn't called her that in a while, it was strange hearing it again from someone else, maybe the name had lost its power. She raised an eyebrow questioning Logan, "Ah, But can your reputation stand being seen out with me?"

"Perhaps they think we're starting a friends and family support group - Psychotic Murderers Anon…" His face dropped, "I'm, sorry Mac, I didn't mean…" He looked apologetic but his words weren't far from what she knew were his thoughts.

"It is kind of how I feel today," she said quietly. Mac released the death grip on her coffee cup so the waiter could refill it. Once he'd retreated back to the counter she continued, "It's weird… today…" _Waiting to visit his grave…_

"You don't have to go Mac. I can…"

She shook her head. "No, I should… I want to." She owed it to Dick if nothing else. He couldn't stop loving the Cassidy he'd shared his childhood with, and needed to stop blaming himself for what Cassidy had become.

"You loved him? I mean… it's none of my business. I'm sorry." He sounded embarrassed.

She sat in silence staring into the deep black of her coffee cup, listening to her heartbeat, thinking back to her time with Cassidy. She answered the question, "Yes - I thought so anyway."

Logan was silent, giving her time to follow her thoughts.

"I thought I was getting past it. Learning to trust again. Now…"

"Max?" he asked tentatively.

She bit her lip, "Well, he obviously didn't deserve my trust."

"You're ok?"

"Max? It's not really… I don't miss him… it's just…" Mac reached for the sugar - it was something to do, something to distract her. "We launched into a relationship without talking…"

"I remember, hot nerd on nerd action!" he smirked.

She rolled her eyes, "I mean…" she sighed, "We never got to know each other… I never told him about Cassidy. He thought I was some…"

"Smart mouth computer geek?" he was teasing, but he had made her smile.

"Remind me again _why_ are we friends?"

"Beats me! My social secretary's usually better at weeding out the _riff-raff_." He dodged the packet of sugar Mac threw in his direction.

She continued while he was distracted, "Max thought I was this confident, fun, college girl, and it was easier to let him treat me like I was, than to tell him… about Cassidy. It was better than the pitying, infuriating patience."

"Bronson?" he prompted.

She nodded. "He was so damn good… always said the right thing, the polite thing."

"_Wait_, that's _bad_, right?" Logan was using his fake surprised voice.

"Is Veronica still with Piz?"

Logan mimed his melodramatic light-bulb moment. Weighing the imaginary options in his hands, gasping in mock astonishment when he discovered the perverse truth, and finishing with an expression so smug you'd think Veronica were already waiting in his bed.

Mac was nonplussed, and ignoring Logan's antics continued where she'd left off. "I thought I was doing ok with Max, figured I could be the person he thought I was - just ignore Cassidy… But then… I couldn't tell him about Dick…" She paused for a moment, and looking into his eyes she asked directly, "He's not ok is he?"

Smug Logan was replaced by uncomfortable Logan. His mouth open, lost for words, making Mac feel guilty. She barely knew Dick, she had no right to ask - it wasn't fair to expect Logan to betray his friend. She looked away, embarrassed, back to staring at the restaurant across the road.

When she realised it was Dick she could see ineffectually kicking an expensive looking car Logan had already disappeared to run into traffic. It took a moment for Mac to respond. As she hurriedly left a tip and followed she could hear the other diners laughing. From Mac's perspective it wasn't funny, but she couldn't expect them to realise her friend had been let down by his family once again.

Dick was calmer by the time Mac crossed the street - well, he was no longer kicking the car in which his father had presumably made a hasty retreat; instead he was pacing up and down as Logan stood with his back to the wall - _watching_.

Logan tried to take the keys when the valet returned Dick's truck, but Dick shook him off, insisting he was ok. "Well, are you coming?" he asked opening the passenger door for Mac.

As she took her seat she nodded in response to Logan's questioning 'Are you sure?' look, giving him a brief smile. When Dick walked around to the driver's side she reassured Logan, "We'll be fine."

Logan leant over the door and caught Dick's attention.

"I'm ok, he just… he caught me off guard," said Dick. "I know, you warned me, I just… Thanks… we'll be fine. I'll see you later."

"So, I guess I'll just walk back to the hotel?" muttered Logan.

"Sorry, get in, I'll drop…"

"Could you take my car?" asked Mac, "I can pick her up later." She needed to get going. Logan's presence wasn't doing much to calm her or Dick, and she'd sooner they got going the sooner it would be over. "It'll be easier to pick it up from there."

She dropped the keys into Logan's hand. Dick nodded a hasty goodbye and pulled away leaving Logan on the sidewalk.

When they stopped at the next junction Dick was thinking more clearly, "Does he know where you parked?"

"It's just across the street. He can call if he can't find her." She turned to look at him, studying his features. "How was surfing?" she asked, studiously avoiding talk of Dick's father.

"Better than lunch with my Dad," he said his voice still clouded by anger. They continued in silence for a while until he added… "You can ask…"

"Not while you're driving. If you want to tell me about your dad, pull over, I'll drive."

"Uh, no."

"Misogynistic much?"

"You're like tiny, you can barely see over the dash. Call me when you reach a real height and I'll give you lessons driving a _big girl_ car."

"Yeah, yeah. My dad lets me drive the RV, that's like three times the size of your _kiddie truck_." Ok, so technically her father had only let her drive while he had sat beside her, giving a running commentary on what she should and shouldn't be doing, flinching every time they encountered another vehicle - but she didn't need to tell Dick that.

"What's he like?"

It was strange, keeping the MacKenzie secret. Switched at birth and growing up with the wrong parents, Mac had always felt like an outsider in her own family, but the understanding that came with knowing the truth had helped her fit in. Maybe some day she'd be able to tell her parents she knew, and _she_ chose them too. And in comparison to Dick's, her family were the dream. "We're different, but they're good - when they're not stuffing me into the RV and dragging me on mystery adventures."

"You'd miss it if they stopped trying," he sounded sad.

"Yeah," she admitted, returning them to silence.

When they pulled onto the PCH instead of heading inland to the cemetery Mac wondered briefly if Dick had changed his mind. "Where…?" she realised she had no idea where Cassidy's ashes were buried.

"He's not here. Not with the others."

She didn't need to ask who 'the others' were: Meg, Marcos, Peter, Betina, Cervando and Rhonda. They weren't his only victims, but somehow the driver, the teacher, the stuntman, the pilot and the deputy didn't count when the media had younger, prettier, _named_ victims to mourn. The paedophile was mentioned as infrequently as possible, an inconvenient twist in the story of a teenage psycho.

And then there were the living, hidden victims, each carrying a painful echo of Cassidy's life along with them: The grieving families; Dick, the guilty brother; Mac, the conflicted girlfriend; Veronica, the survivor; Logan, the helpless bystander; and Duncan, the single parent raising Meg's daughter in exile unable to return to Neptune.

"He's the other side of L.A., near Santa Barbara. Mom didn't want him near anyone who knew… I can turn around. We can go back…"

"No, it's ok." She sat back into her seat, watching the road, memories of Cassidy flooding her thoughts. The good morphing into the bad as she contrasted the ignorant fun of their time together, with the painful understanding she gained in the difficult year that had followed his death. Cassidy was like a double sided jigsaw, each good piece mirrored with something bad, something he'd done to someone, something that had been done to him, something that accounted for his actions, his way of being. However hard she tried she would never be able to find the missing pieces, the pieces Cassidy had kept hidden from everyone.

Veronica had helped - after he died - answered her questions, well, the ones she wasn't too afraid to ask. The rest she'd gleaned from overheard conversations; articles she'd managed to read half way through before walking away, shutting down, pretending she didn't want to know.

* * *

When they stopped for gas Dick thumped the steering wheel before getting out. Mac wasn't sure whether to follow him and talk, or wait in the truck. Instead she took the third option and wandered silently into the artificial light of the convenience store.

The air conditioning, cold against her skin, caused a shiver to reverberate through her spine. As she stood inside the entryway, a few lonely customers wandered the aisles taking a brief break from their journeys. The background noise from the coolers straining to fill the silence, punctuated only occasionally by a shoe squeaking against the vinyl floor.

She moved aside when two boys dragged their father to a shelf of garish plastic toys, excited by the prospect of a promised treat. As she watched, the younger boy's delicate features and dark curls were briefly occluded by a memory of Cassidy's wary scowl, but the happy grin of a child whose father loved him won through. If he were blond he could easily be her younger brother, off on a trip with his family. She wondered how long it had been since Cassidy participated in a similar scene. Had he ever?

As Mac traced the boys' progress to the counter, she spotted the clerk giving her an odd look and moved on into the store. When her brain caught up she realised she was looking at the sad flowers, reaching for a single white rose wrapped in cellophane, holding it reverentially in her fingers. It was a simple, pathetic tribute, she should have bought something in Neptune, but somehow this token spoke to her, felt right for the moment.

She could sense him behind her. In just the week since they had fallen into their strange friendship, the rhythm of his breathing, his scent, his shadow, had become familiar facets of her life. He leant past, selected a red rose, and paused briefly at her side - not quite touching - before moving on to the drinks cooler.

He was staring at the beer when she turned around, but after she selected two bottles of water he left it and trailed her through the store.

"Liquorice?"

He nodded.

* * *

At the truck she stopped. She didn't want to get back in while Dick was still angry. "I meant it" she said. "I'll drive, or we can stay here and talk, or…"

Dick looked hurt.

"This isn't easy for me either…" she was exasperated.

He kicked at the ground… "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have brought you. This was always going to be a sucky day. It was s'posed to be cathartic or something."

"I loved him too," she protested. She continued, embarrassed forcing herself to look at him, even if he wouldn't make eye contact. "I know, I didn't know him for long, or know him well; and I don't really know you; and I'm not Logan - but I am here, and I loved him too, and if you want to tell me about your sucky day I want to hear."

She counted to five in her head before he handed her the keys.

"Are you sure?" she asked. She didn't know if she was asking if he wanted her to drive, or if he wanted to talk about his father, but it didn't matter, the answer was for both questions.

He nodded and climbed into the passenger seat.

He let her drive in silence for a few minutes, only speaking to point out the cruise control button on the steering wheel. Was he thinking about his dad? Cassidy? Or just allowing her to acclimatise to his truck?

"He didn't know…" he said quietly. "He didn't know it was Cassidy's birthday… He dragged me to lunch, and… I thought he was just avoiding mentioning Cassidy cos it's painful, but he didn't even remember. "

There wasn't anything for Mac to say, well, nothing she could think of that would help. She was sorry, obviously, but being sorry that someone has waste of space parents isn't a sentiment it's helpful to express.

"Logan warned me. Guess he's been there."

"What did he want?" she asked to break the silence.

Dick hit the door. "For the world to do him a favour, well me… just legal crap... the feds unfroze his accounts… the ones they couldn't link to the fraud… he wants me to have power of attorney while he's in jail… apparently he doesn't trust his business manager… yeah… the irony…" he added, tipping his head back against the seat.

"Can he make you?"

"No. Just make me feel guilty." Dick turned to look at her, "He's taking credit for Cassidy's business."

"Phoenix Land Trust?"

"Yup… he's so deluded he thinks it was his idea. Wants to try it again when he's done his time… said I could be CEO."

She shot him a worried look.

"I'm not stupid MackyC. I'm a business major, I know _just_ how dumb that would be…" He looked back to the road, the cars they passed. "I don't know why I thought he'd remember Cassidy's birthday. It's not like he cared before Cass…"

Mac could hear the missing word '_Jumped_'…

He took a deep breath and finished his sentence, "It's not like he cared while we were growing up."

"Was it always bad?"

"No… not always, we had fun with Aunt Chloe, and even my parents sometimes… I don't know, maybe it was always bad and I just didn't notice. I was too busy… I wanted dad to like me, it didn't matter he didn't like Cassidy. I was selfish."

"No, your parents are supposed to love you both. It shouldn't matter what either of you do. They aren't supposed to make you compete for their love. They aren't supposed to run away and leave you."

"But I'm better off without him."

'_Yeah_' thought Mac.

* * *

They walked in relative silence through the cemetery. Dick had thought he knew where Cassidy's ashes were buried, but when they finally found his marker it was a few rows away from the place they had first looked. Rows filled with anonymous loved ones who'd died in the year since Cassidy's jump from the roof of the Grand.

The plots around Cassidy were heavy with fresh laid flowers. Mac guessed the snake of flowery tributes weaved its way through the cemetery as each subsequent family came to mark the anniversary of their loss. This wasn't the anniversary of Cassidy's death, but the anniversary of his birth - just weeks apart this day was easier for Mac to deal with, she wasn't sure it was any easier on Dick though. It should have been Cassidy's eighteenth birthday.

Cassidy's final resting place was marked with a simple white stone, flat to the ground. It just said 'Cassidy', there were no dates and no last name, nothing to alert the unsuspecting to the presence of a mass murderer. How long would it take before his resting place was forgotten altogether?

Mac stepped forward and placed her rose, her sad tribute, over Cassidy's name.

When she stood back beside Dick he was agitated, passing the rose he'd chosen from hand to hand. Eventually he spoke, his voice harsh, breaking, "I hate him - for what he did. I love him, I miss him and I hate him."

He stepped forward and placed his rose alongside hers. When he stepped back he reached for her hand, crushing her fingers briefly before relaxing into a more gentle hold.

After a moment's reflection he walked away, his hand waiting briefly for her to follow. The only indication anyone still cared for Cassidy the two roses laid in his honour - one white, one red, side by side a symbol of their shared tragedy.

* * *

**Author's Note: **Hope you enjoyed this chapter, and hope you want to see more of the story! … if you do, a review will help encourage me to write, and will make the next update appear just that much faster! … see that box there … write something in it! Thanks! x


	9. Chapter 9 - Temporarily?

**Author's Note:** Wowsers! It has been far too long, but hopefully you're all ready for an update … and hopefully it's not a disappointment!

Sorry for the delay … I was away on holiday and when I came back it was difficult to launch straight back into writing. I've not been neglecting the story, but instead of writing this chapter I ended up writing a random future chapter that I may never even use, and drawing a story cover image for the story so you don't have to put up with my Dragonfly avatar any longer! … anyway, I thought a MaDi story deserved a MaDi pic, and who doesn't love drawing Mac & Dick? Well, I had fun! … *grins*

Thanks heaps for all the lovely reviews! … each and every review makes me smile! … remember, authors put in ooodles of work for every chapter, so a little review goes a long way to reward us for our time and effort! If you like this story, and want it to continue, reviewing is definitely the way to go! … and that goes for all the fabulous new MaDi fic working it's way on to the forum … go on, read & review and encourage the authors who are bringing MaDi to life in so many different forms!

BeWitchingRedhead36  u/3184342/ has worked out a new carrot/stick system of encouragement … I definitely preferred the carrot of reading her new chapter to the stick she had in mind if I failed to post this in an even less than timely manner! … Hopefully she'll forgive me for borrowing her for this chapter … and something very funny she said to me in a PM!

And thanks to liferscove2118 u/620524/liferscove2118 for the extra PM reminding me she was enjoying this fic!

* * *

**Chapter 9**

* * *

The sun was coming down over the ocean as they wound their way along the familiar route into Neptune. Mac was curled in the passenger seat trying not to yawn. It wasn't late, but the emotions of the day and the long drive had drained her.

Dick was driving, speaking, "It's good he had you. I'm glad he had something normal."

"Normal?" she asked, with disbelief. How could he think her relationship with Cassidy was normal?_ Normal doesn't leave you sobbing in a hotel room wrapped in a shower curtain unable to trust again. Normal doesn't leave you thinking you're worthless. Normal doesn't leave you second guessing everyone looking for their hidden motive. Normal doesn't leave you with a first love you actually understand better after he's killed a dozen people and jumped to his death. Normal doesn't change the person you are._

"I mean… you were someone he could be happy with. You always had these goofy grins, like nobody else mattered."

"It wasn't normal Dick," she was trying to keep her voice calm while her heart ricocheted around her chest. "He didn't know how to love, after… after Woody. He didn't love me, he was screwed up… he was cruel."

Dick pulled into the parking lot by the beach and hit the breaks.

"I loved him and he hurt me." Her voice was raised, agitated. "He took everything, I can never go back, never be the same again." She was pleading with him, "It wasn't normal. He wasn't normal."

Dick was breathing heavily. He was agitated, "I'm sorry, I mean I know he hurt you. I'm sorry… I just… I need…"

He jumped down from the truck, and gasping for air he headed out onto the sand.

Mac sat for a moment gathering her thoughts. She wasn't sorry: Dick didn't have the right to label her relationship with Cassidy. She was the one who had lived through it, had to live with it for the rest of her life. She had loved Cassidy, she even understood him now - as much as anyone could. But even the good parts, the goofy grins they'd shared when she thought nobody else mattered, even those were tainted by hindsight: He had always been desperate to keep her at arms length; always kept her distracted - Cassidy had always been hiding from her.

Dick had sunk to his knees before he made it to the ocean. When Mac followed she sat quietly in the sand a couple of feet to his side, listening as his breathing eased somewhat.

She should have let it be. Dick didn't need to be reminded his brother wasn't normal - not today. It had been a harmless comment, a moment's fantasy. Of course Dick hoped that some kind of normality had entered Cassidy's final few months. _Why couldn't she let him cling to that belief?_ There had been good bits. Of course there had been good bits. But normal?

She concentrated on her heartbeat, trying to calm the anxiety that was rising once again. They'd managed the hard part of the day - they'd visited Cassidy's grave; the rest of the day should be simple. But even as she thought it she knew how naïve it was: Cassidy could always hurt them, more now they were trying to be friends.

When the remnants of the sunset had fallen into the sea Dick finally acknowledged her presence, "Sorry… I can't…" he paused, "He's like the bird in the cage… the illusion… sometimes I just see the bird, I forget about the cage…"

"Sometimes I just see the cage," she replied. "Sometimes I…" she stopped her thought. Sometimes she just saw the cage Cassidy created for her. Trapped in her own vulnerability, naked just a shower curtain to cling to.

Dick rose to his feet and was suddenly illuminated against the night by the headlights of a truck making its noisy way onto the beach. It was being followed by two more when the engine cut and a guy leaning out of the door yelled, "Dick! Didn't know you were coming! Give us a hand with the keg."

The party erupted around them as more vehicles disgorged their passengers, and music and alcohol began to flow. Dick was lost to a sea of bodies, illuminated by the flickering fire and blinding headlights.

He had shrugged his shoulders at her as if to ask consent before wandering into the light to join their old classmates; maybe he interpreted her lack of response as enthusiasm. "Come on, five minutes?"

Mac followed reluctantly, maybe she owed him five minutes. These were his friends, why shouldn't he spend time with them, released temporarily from their pseudo friendship, free to avoid all thoughts of Cassidy. _Temporarily_? Mac wondered why this mattered to her. She could call Logan to collect her, deal with Dick; head home; enjoy family games night; prepare for the Kane internship she was starting in the morning. But, they needed to talk - she needed to talk - make sure they were ok before she departed. It was supposed to be cathartic - it wouldn't be if she left things unresolved.

Alone within a crowd of people, she held on to the cup of beer he handed her. She hadn't resorted to drinking it, but it _was_ camouflage, something that said she belonged. Something to do with her hands as she watched 'High School Dick' reappear as part of a strange mix of their old pirate classmates.

She wondered absently if anybody here remembered her, they'd done a great job of ignoring her through high school, she wouldn't complain if that trend continued. Mac recognised a few faces from her graduation class - looking superior, enjoying their novelty college student status - among the crowd of high school kids and fresh graduates. Dick and Luke were enthusing about frat parties and college girls. His tale of the time he broke up a feminist rally, gyrating with a blow up French Maid, ended differently to how she recalled - but maybe he'd managed to suppress the memory of a knee to the groin, or perhaps he'd been too drunk to realise it wasn't a sexual advance.

She couldn't complain about Dick's regression though, she could feel herself being pulled back just the same. If only she could find 'High School Mac' again: decisive Mac, the Mac who saw an opportunity and went for it, selling her classmates secrets with the Purity Test Website; no-nonsense Mac who crashed Madison Sinclair's party to meet her birth mother; innocent Mac who fell for a boy and invited him to the Sadie Hawkins Dance. Unfortunately her point of singularity came later - after graduation, after high school, after her innocence had been shattered.

Familiar faces, returned from the mists of time, brought with them echoes of that night: fear, isolation, helplessness, all threatening to wash over her if she would let them. She could feel the nausea rise as the chants of "Chug, chug, chug" grew to a crescendo around her. She backed away from the group surrounding Dick and slid down into the sand, propping herself against a truck's wheel.

When the cheers died back she could hear low male voices lost in the dark… behind the truck?

"Who invited the _Dick_?" the voice was malevolent. Ok, so Dick had been a dick in high school, but, this was an 09er party. Mac was confused!

"Dunno! Why's he in Neptune?"

"Lives with Logan - Echolls - at the Grand!"

"Where Beaver splattered? Twisted!"

Mac was getting angry, who were they to judge Dick? They didn't know him, couldn't possibly understand what he'd been through. What they'd both been through.

"He brought his psycho brother's ex along too…"

"The computer geek?" A girl's voice entered the conversation, "She had a lunch date with Logan."

"Guess she likes the psycho killer genes, and a bank balance to die for. Makes sense!"

Mac's was fuming. Why couldn't they do her a favour and ignore her like before?

The girl spoke again, "Echols wasn't impressed, legged it without even saying goodbye! I mean, ran into traffic to get away from her - _Ghostworld_. It was _so_ funny!" The girl was laughing at her own story.

Mac's mistake was trying to jump to her feet to see who was talking. She didn't fall, she had the truck to grab hold of; but she did manage to shower herself with the contents of the red solo cup she still clung to.

The shock of cold sticky beer seeping through her clothes paralysed Mac. When she remembered the conversation she'd overheard, all she could see in the dark were retreating forms wearing Neptune letterman jackets, and a girl. It must have been one of the girls from earlier - the giggling cohort from her lunch with Logan - but she couldn't be sure which. Maybe the redhead she though, reflecting on her silhouette.

Mac tried pealing her shirt away from her sticky skin - it didn't help; pools of beer had collected in her bra; she could feel rivulets running down her spine seeping into her combats; even her hair was soaked, strangling where it clung to her neck.

"Mac?"

She turned around to see Lizzie Manning holding out a towel and a bottle of water. "I'm not sure it'll help, but, it's this or skinny dipping."

"Thanks"

"Got stung or something?"

Mac shook her head "I just… I wasn't thinking."

Mac took in Lizzie's altered appearance. Since the bus crash, since Meg's death, since the birth of Meg's illegitimate child: their parents had subdued their other children, kept them firmly within a controlling grasp. Mac was used to Lizzie the catholic schoolgirl - not the fantasy catholic schoolgirl - one of the real ones, with long skirts, and thick jumpers; but this was the original Lizzie stood before her, all golden curls, thick lipstick and cleavage.

Lizzie queried, embarrassed, "Have you… did you hear anything?" she asked.

Mac remembered her phone, fished it from her pocket, hoping desperately that it had avoided the beer shower. Lizzie was seeking news of her niece, Meg's daughter, _his_ daughter. She was being paranoid, nobody could hack into her thoughts, it was safe to _think_ his name: _Duncan_ she said firmly, if only to herself.

The phone was sticky, but she couldn't tell if it was her fingers or the pocket anymore - everything felt sticky. It didn't appear to be wet so she flicked through to find the photos: the angelic toddler, all blonde curls and similes. The latest had arrived just this week, the night she'd slept with Dick on his couch - she shivered wondering why she was recalling that right now.

"Thanks!" Lizzie was lost, smiling, exploring the features of the niece she would never know.

Mac grinned to herself wondering if the young girl would grow up wilful and wild like her Aunts, Lizzie Manning and Lily Kane, or placid and calm like her parents Meg and Duncan.

"You can contact him?" asked Lizzie.

"No," lied Mac - she could, she shouldn't though, and she didn't want to. Mac was already more involved with Duncan than made her happy; just receiving his messages was enough, he didn't need replies seeking him out.

Lizzie ignored her, "I need you to tell him, things have changed. Dad… he had a stroke… he can't walk, can't leave his room… Mom's spends all her time looking after him, but she's standing up to him finally. There's nurses, and physiotherapists and social workers in and out of the house all day. Things are good we can look after Faith."

"I can't."

"Please?"

"You're going to college, what happens when you're gone? What happens when your dad gets better?" Mac wondered why she was engaging in the argument, prolonging the fantasy.

"I'm staying, going to Hearst. If things turn bad I'll get a job, I'll look after her. She won't have to run. She'll be with family. I'll love her."

"She's with her father."

"Just tell him?"

The towel and water hadn't helped. Mac was wetter, but no less sticky than when it had just been beer; and her teeth were starting to chatter in the frigid chill of the evening. She was agitated, Lizzie was asking her to cross a line that shouldn't be crossed. She handed back the beer soaked towel and held out her hand for her phone.

Lizzie was hesitant…

"My phone?" asked Mac, pointedly.

When Dick stepped forward, and ripped the phone from Lizzie's hands the girls realised they had company. "What the hell Lizzie?" he asked turning to a beer soaked Mac.

"It wasn't…" Mac tried to find the words to diffuse the situation. "I'll try…" she called as Lizzie walked away.

Lizzie turned around, smiled her thanks, and was gone - back into the circle of light.

"What happened?"

"Nothing!" she said truthfully. As she took her phone she noticed Dick's knuckles were grazed, and looking up she caught the cut at the corner of his mouth. He smiled, lopsidedly, and winced when the cut obviously hurt. _Why had she let herself be drawn into an 09er party?_

"He asked for it…" mumbled Dick as she walked purposefully back up the beach towards the parking lot.

"Hey Mac, wait up!"

She continued, wishing she didn't squelch when she walked.

He was babbling. She was trying to work out if it was an apology, or a justification or something else.

"I needed to be normal… forget about Cass… celebrate his birthday… just hangout, like every other college student home for the summer." His hand fell on her shoulder, forcing her to stop. "I forgot they aren't my friends, not now. I haven't seen them since… not like that, not together." He plucked at her sodden shirt. "I shouldn't have left you, it was totally uncool. Just things got kinda intense, before," he paused. "I brought you, I should have stayed with you. I'm sorry."

So he was trying to apologise. She looked up, finally meeting his gaze, "Yeah, ok…"

"You're so cool MackyC."

The déjà vu hit Mac, and when he leant in to kiss her she was so busy rolling her eyes, she nearly forgot to shove him away. Nearly! "What the hell Dick? A drunken kiss at the end of a drunken apology doesn't improve the nature of the apology."

He grinned at her again, sheepishly. She couldn't help a little smile when he winced from his cut lip, but she continued to berate him as they walked towards the truck.

"Do you have like a change of clothes or something?" she asked eventually.

"There's a blanket… probably a towel too… what happened…"

"I don't want to talk about it," she mumbled. "How'd you get the cuts?"

He snorted avoiding the question. "I can take you straight home?"

"You aren't driving. You're drunk."

"Least I don't smell like a brewery."

"Least I didn't get into a fight."

"Least I'm not about to leave a sticky puddle in someone else's ride."

"You can't tell me your ride hasn't seen its fair share or sticky puddles in its time."

When Dick didn't have a response Mac turned to check his expression. He hurriedly shut his mouth and tried to continue their bickering session. "Yeah, well, least I didn't get beat up by a girl."

"I didn't… it wasn't Lizzie - she was helping. Look, nothing happened, really; it was this vacuous red head I saw at lunch, she was talking to a couple of jocks… about us… I was just startled. I spilled the beer myself."

"They got me too," he said fingering his cut. "Kelly Kuzio, Jason Santos and his girlfriend. She was the bait, fucking bewitching. Then they started on about Cass. Kelly was his friend, back in little league. I guess Kelly was one of the lucky ones… he doesn't believe what happened to Cassidy… doesn't want to believe. Santos' friend died in the crash."

Mac sighed, apparently even vacuous extras wanted their moment of revenge. "You're ok?" she asked sadly.

"Yeah, I backed out of there pretty quick. I'm not Logan."

* * *

**Author's Note: **Thanks heaps for reading! … now, see the box there, slap in a review … I'll love you forever if you do! … and you'll encourage me to write that little bit faster! … thanks! x


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